Seize the Moment
by kz4valentina
Summary: Set at the end of Fifty Shades Darker during Christian's birthday party. What if after the confrontation with Elena, Ana continues having second thoughts about marrying Christian?***** Written in collaboration with Calicutie77-**** ****NOW COMPLETE****
1. Chapter 1 The Pilot

Story description:

Set at the end of Fifty Shades Darker during Christian's birthday party. What if after the confrontation with Elena, Ana continues having second thoughts about marrying Christian? Perhaps the evil witch had a point? Will Christian have to change his fifty ways and convince her she's ALL he needs or will Ana come to trust and understand that she's enough for him? What if things turn out differently this time. What if Ana had said: I don't want to break up with you, I just don't want to marry you.

* * *

Chapter One: The pilot

Christian POV

"I remember the last time you took me to the boathouse," she tells me.

I chuckle quietly. "Oh, that was fun. In fact…" I scoop her over my shoulder, and she squeals.

"You were angry, if I remember correctly."

"Anastasia, I'm always really angry."

I playfully swat her behind and stop outside the wooden door. I slide her down my body and back to the ground and take her head in my hands.

A shadow crosses her eyes, but I decide to ignore it.  
I lean down and kiss her hard. My heart is beating fast, I'm excited. I step forward. "I've something to show you in here," I murmur and open the door to the motorboat. I take her hand and lead her up the wooden stairs to the attic. I open the door and step aside to let her in.

Her mouth drops open when she steps into the room filled with flowers. There are beautiful wild meadow flowers mixed with glowing Christmas lights and miniature lanterns that glow soft and pale around the room.

"You wanted hearts and flowers," I murmur.

She blinks up at me, speechless.

"You have my heart," I say waving toward the room.

"And here are the flowers," she completes the sentence. She doesn't smile, and I start to feel that something is not right. No, I tell myself she must be feeling nervous.

"Christian, it's lovely," she says with a forced smile.

Tugging her hand, I pull her fully into the room and then I sink into one knee in front of her and produce a ring from the inside pocket in my jacket. The ring is quite impressive—three carat, oval platinum.

"Anastasia Steele. I love you. I want to love, cherish, and protect you for the rest of my life. Be mine. Always. Share my life with me. Marry me."

I look up at her expectantly. Tears start falling down her face. I soon realize they're not tears of happiness and my heart sinks faster than the Titanic.

"God, Christian, I'm sorry… I can't... I can't marry you."

"Marry me," I insist, standing up. I'm trying to stay cool, but it's getting harder by the second. What the FUCK is this? I want to yell. I run a hand through my hair, trying to calm down. "What do you mean you can't marry me?"

"I can't I just can't. That's all." She says, flustered, wiping the tears from her eyes.

I feel my face flush with emotion and stand up. I look around me in disgust. This is a major disaster. "Why are you doing this Anastasia?" I hiss. "You said you loved me... …"

"Christian. Of course, I love you is just that I changed my mind…maybe we're moving too fast-

With an angry cry, I grab her arm and glare at her. "You CHANGED YOUR MIND? JUST LIKE THAT?"

"Let go," she demands, both angry and frightened. " I'm not leaving you, Christian," she tries to reassure me, and something clicks inside my head. I don't want to hurt her so I let go of her arm. "Christian, I don't want to break up with you, I just don't want to marry you." She takes a deep breath and lets it out with an audible sigh. " I'm not ready to get married, I need more time-

FUCK! My brain hears all the mumbo-jumbo, but all I hear is the last part when SHE TELLS ME AGAIN she doesn't want to marry me. I feel like I'm a ticking bomb about to explode. I can't even think. "You…you can't do this."

"Please try to understand," she begs. "I need time. You never give me time to think!"

Ana tries to touch my arm, but I pull away as if she were a venomous snake. It's the same arm that's still holding the velvet box with the ring. My fingers tighten around it for a few seconds, and then I fling it across the room before I bolt out the door.

"Christian!" I hear her calling after me, but I don't care, I don't care anymore. I walk away and can't help but hear Elena's words playing in my head. Love is for fools, Christian.

I've been nothing but a fool, I realize. The fucking truth was right there in front of me, but I refused to see it. Anastasia doesn't love me. Whatever she did back there was not love. I cross the lawn under the dramatic red-orange moonlight, and I fume. How could I have been so fucking blind? I never even saw this coming.

 **A/N:**

I've only read a tiny fraction of FSOG stories (only a handful from the top writers on here), so this one will be different from other stories that you've read just because I don't know any better (ha-ha). Sounds good? PLEASE REVIEW.  
This is my first attempt at writing a canon based story. Be kind. Thanks in advance.


	2. Chapter 2 The Secret Room

**A/N:**

Okay, so in writing this, I realized that following what happens in book 3 is too restricting, so it is more accurate to say that from this point forward, the timeline is altered and so, expect the unexpected in this story. That is, this story is my version of what could have happened if Ana had re-considered her decision to marry Christian until all her doubts and questions had been answered to her complete satisfaction. That's not to say they were not meant to be married (I believe they were) but to me it feels like their engagement and marriage was rushed. Marriage is such a huge life changing commitment and given Ana's background it makes more sense she would have waited until she was absolutely sure. Let me know what you think at the end.

In response to your questions, there is NO CHEATING, HEA. I couldn't fit everything in the story summary, I ran out of space, lol.

* * *

Chapter two: The secret room

Ana's POV

While Sawyer drives me back to Escala, I hear Elena's words playing in my head: " _He's not capable of marriage."_ And I keep thinking, What if she was right? What if I'm not good enough for him…what if it ends up being that I can't please him the way he NEEDS me to.

I desperately need to talk to somebody, so I call the only person I know who will not allow me to sink in the world of _never-ending What If's._ Kate being Kate, she can tell right away something's wrong.

"Okay, Steele, spill the beans. What's going on?"

"It's Christian. Oh, Kate, I don't know what to do. He proposed with a ring...and I told him I needed more time to make up my mind."

There was dead silence on the other end of the line, and I wondered if she was still there. "Kate?"

"You did?"

I take a deep breath trying to keep the tears at bay. Yes, I was happy. But some of the things that Elena said hit home for me and I still have my doubts about Flynn. I'm not convinced that the solution to all our problems can be summed up with a simple: _Keep doing what you're doing'._

"I think I messed up," I tell her, crying. Sawyer shoots me a concerned look through the rear-view mirror. "I told him I changed my mind and that I needed more time." While I still think that I need more time to before making a lifelong commitment (heaven forbid, I unconsciously follow in my mother's footsteps), I'm also terrified of losing him.

"And now he thinks I'm breaking up with him." I sob. "But that's not it at all. "

"Did you try and explain ?"

"I did. But he wouldn't listen."

"Good for you!." There's a long pause, and it occurs to me she may be distracted with something else at the moment. "It sounds like he was too upset. Give him some time to cool down."

I sigh inwardly. I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place. Christian can be so possessive and controlling; I had to put the brakes. I just knew that once we were officially engaged, he would have insisted on a quick marriage. Marry in haste and repent at leisure. I look out the window, we're getting close to Escala, and I picture Mr. Mercurial giving me the cold shoulder. Perhaps, Kate is right. I ask Sawyer to drive me somewhere else for a little while. Yeah, maybe it would be best if I give myself some space without feeling guilty about it. There's nothing wrong with that.

* * *

Narrator POV

Elena punches in the code for the elevator at Escala. She needs to hurry before Christian gets home. When she left the party was still in full swing but who knows, there's always the change that he too will decide to leave early.

She's thinking she's going to find something incriminating about Ana or even Christian, something that she can later use to blackmail him in case he wants to liquidate the salon business.

The code works to grant her access to the pent-house but if her calculations are correct, the staff is probably in bed, and there should only be one security guy in the CCTV room. Hopefully, she can have him eating out of the palm of her hand in no time.

And Lo and behold! There he is! The one guy she was hoping to see.

Baby-faced Ryan is there to meet her right as she steps out of the elevator.

"May I help you, ma'am?" He cocks his head politely. She thinks it's funny he's acting all nice and proper as if

Elena lets out a light-hearted chuckle. "Oh, Hello, Ryan," she says his name in a sultry tone. **"We don't have much time," she says giving him a pointed look.**

 **Ryan tugs at his shirt collar and looks miserable. At last he digs into his pocket and produces a key.**

 **Elena grabs the key and drops it in her purse.** "Why don't you keep me a little company while I wait for Mr. Grey," she drops her Christian Dior purse on the nearest couch and bridges the distance between them. She believes Ryan will keep mum rather than take a chance and have his connections to the lifestyle be exposed. Worst-case scenario, she can always threaten to have him fired by claiming he sexually harassed HER. It would be his word against hers. And before Ryan gets a chance to think, she kisses him fully on the lips.

Ryan steps back, startled, he's turned on, but this is his place of employment. Elena grabs him by his tie and kisses him again while her hands rub the front of his pants. He tries to put some distance between them. And then, most unexpectedly, Elena sneaks behind him and grabs the closest object-a bronze cat figurine—and uses it to smack him in the back of the head. Ryan is knocked out cold. He'll be all right; it's for his own protection.

Quickly, Elena grabs her purse and makes it to the security room and pulls out the recording CD from the CCTV. She sneaks around the apartment with ease since she knows that none of her activities are being recorded.

 **She fishes for the key and turns the corner to Christian' s study, making a beeline for his desk. A quick turn of the key gives her immediate access to the drawers of his filing cabinet.** She can't believe her luck; the dom/sub contracts and other documents are there at the tips of her fingers. She quickly pulls out her blackberry out of her purse and starts taking pictures. Shit! Her phone battery is running so low it's going to die any minute now.

Holy shit! She hears voices coming from the great room and down the hallway. She scampers away like a rat out of a barn and hides behind a couch with her back pressed against the wall to ceiling bookcase and clutching her handbag.

Suddenly, the panel behind her slides sideways. Behind it, there is a narrow space several feet high. Elena feels the pressure of having to make a split second decision. She eagerly feels along the back wall of the opening; maybe there is an alcove or something where she could easily hide for a few minutes until security gives up their search. A slight push and she's able to crawl through the wall with a sense of triumph.

She finds the room dimly lit but much to her own horror, it suddenly plunges into darkness when the panel door swings shut. Elena cries out and attempts to push against it but the door has no interior handle and cannot be opened from the inside. She pulls her phone out of her handbag, hoping it can work as a flashlight, but the screen is off and refuses to power back on.

Eventually, her eyes adjust to the darkness, and she realizes that she's trapped in a room smaller than her walk-in closet at home. Imagine that! Even though she's able to stand and walk two or three steps in either direction before she hits another wall, she's positively terrified.

She pushes against the door with all her might, and it dawns on her there's no way out. "HELP" She yells at the top of her lungs. At this point, she doesn't care she gets caught red-handed, she wants out. OH, My GOD! The minutes tick by and nothing happens. Slowly, she realizes that the walls in this place are heavily padded. OH, GOD! Her fingers blindly trace the walls around her covered with heavy-weight upholstery fabric –the kind with machine sewn buttonholes, very much like the walls of confinement rooms often found in insane asylums. These walls, these awful walls seemed to be closing in on her; they have all the markings of The Shining, the worst horror movie ever. She screamed again. In her mind's eye, Jack Nicholson's crazed-face was starting to resemble her own.

* * *

Christian POV

Something's wrong…terribly wrong.

Taylor motions for me to flatten against the elevator door but I refuse. If there is a breach of security, I'm not going to cower like a coward. So I step off the elevator behind Taylor only because he got a head start. Almost immediately, we stumble upon a prone figure on the floor in the middle of the great room. It's Ryan.

While Taylor tends to Ryan, I venture into the security room to look at the monitors. They seem to be working in perfect order showing the elevator and the garage. The images on the CCTV are live images. I press the red emergency button which makes the alarm activate and let every member of my team know that there has been a breach of security.

"How's he?" I ask Taylor as I head back to the great room. While I was gone, Taylor had moved an unconscious Ryan onto the couch.

"Show me the footage from everything that was recorded in the last six hours," I ask Taylor who immediately leads the way back to the security room.

Taylor presses a button on the computer to eject the CD, but nothing pops out. The CD with the recording is missing. We scan the room for clues. There has been a break- in, and I believe that the perpetrator is hiding somewhere on the premises.

When we come back to the great room, Ryan is sitting up with his back against the foot of the couch. He's got a bump on the back of his head which has stopped bleeding. He appears roughed up, disoriented and his clothes are disheveled.

"Ryan, what happened? Did you see who hit you?" Taylor asks, and Ryan shakes his head no.

Next, Taylor and other service personnel search the entire apartment from top to bottom. I stay in the CCTV room monitoring the live images. While the surveillance cameras moved in different directions, I realize they fail to cover all the nooks and crannies where someone could be hiding. Although I suppose the most troublesome part was how someone sneaked in in the first place and stolen the tape so we could never find out who the perpetrator is. I shake my head in disbelief, already thinking about how the hell we're gonna make sure this doesn't happen again.

While this is happening, I call Sawyer. He should have been back with Ana by now. Ana! My heart skips when I think about the possibility of my Ana being in danger. What if Ana had arrived at Escala before me and encountered the intruder? I shudder at the idea.

"Where are you?" I snap. I hate surprises, and it's obvious he's taken Ana somewhere else. I can barely make out what he's saying. Either he's in a bad signal area, or he's somewhere impossibly loud.

* * *

Narrator POV

Taylor looks for the intruder in Christian's study. A quick glance tells him there was no one there. He has no knowledge of the secret door and neither does he hear Elena's cries for help or her crazed pounding on the door.


	3. Chapter 3 The New Ana

**A/N:**

 **Yes, it's been a long time, sorry about that.**

 **I recently went back and edited the two previous chapters. Go back and re-read. The changes do make a big difference.**

Janicegray ( review Nov 21st): When I read your review something just clicked. I love it when that happens. Anyway, yes, in the books, Ana is always doing all the giving and all the changes. I was thinking something along those lines when I first posted the first chapter, but something changed in the second chapter. After posting it, I got stuck, and inspiration failed me. But then after reading your comments, I decided to go back and change Kate's s advice in chapter 2.

My plan is to give Ana more of a backbone in this story. I realize some of you will not like this new Ana, and that's okay. I'm now excited about this story now exploring a different dynamic between Ana and Christian. Warning: My Ana is going to be a little different, but I just can't write her exactly like in the books...What would be the fun in that?

This chapter starts where the previous one left off.

 _Please be kind, I'm new at writing in first person, and while I try my best, I don't always catch all my mistakes_.

* * *

Chapter Three: The New Ana

Ana POV

Even though I know that deep down Kate still doesn't trust Christian, I ask Sawyer to drive me to the nightclub she suggested. I'm in desperate need of direction, and right now I feel like a sailboat at the mercy of the wind. What I need is a powerboat that will stay its course through troubled waters.

When I arrive, Kate was already waiting for me at a table nursing a cocktail drink.

"Hey, you got here fast," I take a seat across from hers. Almost immediately a waiter arrives to take my order. I order a diet coke

, and Kate rolls her eyes.

The waiter leaves, and Kate clicks her tongue. "You should have what I'm having. It will take off the edge."

I shake my head. "Let's just say I want to keep a clear head for whatever comes next."

"Oh, Ana, I just wish you would lighten up a little."

"I don't need a drink to lighten up," I say, casting Sawyer a furtive glance. He's hanging around the entrance keeping his eye on us while pretending to be invisible.

"Yes you do," Kate points out in an abrasive fashion. "You know something? You're blowing this out of proportion, couples argue all the time and have differences of opinion. Take Elliot and me. We argue all the time, and two hours later it's as if nothing happened." She smiles with a wink.

Something in the way she said that gets my attention. It hadn't occurred to me to simply downplay Christian's reaction to her calling off the engagement.

As if she could perfectly read my mind, she goes on in a nonchalant manner. "You know what you need to do? Just pretend that his blow-up was not a big deal, act normal and don't bring it up again."

The waiter brings my diet coke, I thank him and I take a tiny sip.

"Pretend? You want me to pretend I called off the engagement?"

"Of course not! Steele? " She shakes her head in annoyance. " All I'm saying is to pretend his blow-up never happened...just act normal as if everything is fine between you. He'll be relieved if you ask me. You know how men are, they would rather crawl under a rock and die than talk about relationship problems."

I hesitate. "I don't know if I can do that." This was not what I was hoping for. It looks like I won't be trading in my sailboat for a powerboat anytime soon. My fifty is different from other men, he doesn't exactly fit the mold, I wanna tell her. But I can't tell her all the gory details. Can I?

"C'mon, Ana? What you got to lose? Most likely by the time you get home he's cooled off already. If you act normal, it's unlikely that he will bring up the incident again. If he did it would almost be like picking a fight and guys don't want to pick fights unless they have to."

Right then, Sawyer appears to tell me that Christian has been trying to get hold of me. He doesn't offer many details except that he wants me back home as soon as possible. I nod to Sawyer.

"See? I told you." She says with a grin in her voice. "He's not upset at you anymore; otherwise, he WOULDN'T be asking Sawyer to take you back to his place."

"Give us a minute, Sawyer," I say and Sawyer discreetly disappears to the same spot as before. Now that I know Christian wants me back, I feel more confident. Maybe Kate has a point. "So I shouldn't bring it up again, you say?"

Kate downs the rest of her drink. "You got to surprise him with a new attitude. " She then runs her finger around the rim of the glass, thinking. I take another sip of my soda. "How about a striptease? Or an erotic costume followed by kinky sex?" She winks.

I nearly choked on my drink. Holy cow, if Kate knew even half of my story with Christian...

"You can do it, Ana, " she says with confidence. "You can pull it off... what you need a complete attitude makeover."

* * *

…...

Christian POV

I breathe a sigh of relief when I see Ana step off the elevator. Here I was worried sick that perhaps the intruder had been a distraction from the real McCoy, something a lot more sinister. I have a great imagination, I suppose, although the idea isn't far-fetched. This could have been a fucking kidnapping ploy. Either one of us could have been targeted. It was the perfect opportunity since we were both together and away from home. And then it occurs to me, whoever had been watching us could have kidnapped us bo _th_. But Ana and I did not leave the party together thwarting his or her plans. We had an argument and went our separate ways. A close call indeed. Maybe the man upstairs was looking out for us.

Ana speaks to me. Something in her voice and demeanor seemed decidedly different but I couldn't quite put my finger on it.

"Christian, Sawyer told me about the intruder." She bridges the distance between us and leans up on her tiptoes to kiss me on the lips. "Did you call the police?" She pulls back and looks at me with a concerned expression.

"No. Whoever it was got away." My gaze shifts between Sawyer and Taylor who were hanging around waiting for further instruction. They had already combed the place for the better part of two hours and came up with nothing. The only possible explanation was that the intruder had been brief. He or she had quickly found what they were looking for and taken and somehow fled unnoticed by the security cameras. The puzzling thing was that the footage of the underground garage was also missing. Whoever did this had intimate knowledge of Escala's layout and its security system.

"Is it safe here?" Ana asks, alarmed.

"Absolutely, m'am. We're absolutely certain the intruder is no longer on the premises." Taylor says.

"Otherwise I wouldn't have asked Sawyer to bring you here," I tell her. She makes eye contact with me for a brief moment.

"I need to freshen up," she says. I want to hold her in my arms, but in the next moment she turns around and goes upstairs.

* * *

…...

Ana POV

Christian comes into the master bedroom about half-hour later. By then, I had already taken a shower, and I was in the middle of drying my hair with the hairdryer. I was wearing a short satiny robe and no underwear. As our eyes meet _through the mi_ rror, I could instantly tell he was turned on. As it turned out, he'd been watching me for a little while before I noticed he was there.

I turn off the hairdryer and make my way from the dressing room to the bedroom. "Hey, handsome, I'm looking for a sexy man, he's a master tiger in bed, have you seen him?" I reply in a sexy kitten voice that doesn't sound at all like mine.

I play with his shirt collar. It was fun to see that for once, Christian is a little off his game and not wanting to acknowledge it. He was so used to taking the initiative that he must be wondering what had gotten into me.

"Yep," he said after a moment, his lips quirking into a small smile, regarding me with hooded eyes. "As a matter of fact, the tiger you're looking for is right here," he adds, lowering his lips to brush mine ever so slightly. He then pulls back to look at me as though he can't believe this is me.

I laugh coquettishly. "That sounds lovely. You're exactly what I need right now," I look at him breathlessly. I pause long enough to prolong the intrigue dancing in the air. "I want to be fucked until I can no more." His eyes widen for a fraction of a second, and then he pulls me into his arms, his hands cupping my bottom and pressing me against him.

He smirks.

"Well, my little sex-kitten, don't you ever get tired of me?"

"Tired? " I laugh again, hoping he won't realize how nervous I really am. "How? It's what I need the most." I growl huskily into his ear. I'm really enjoying this. I especially enjoy how with every one of my lines, he hesitates just a little. He doesn't know what to make of this new Ana. My inner-goddess does a happy dance. She definitely approves of this _super-bold-out of -this-world Ana_. This Ana has shed her insecurities and kissed them good-bye. Tonight, this new Ana will become Christian's seductress, I giggle inwardly at the thought.

 **He groans in response and in one swift move, he clasps me around the waist and lifts me onto the bed. His lips find mine, his hands curling around my head, holding me, stilling me as our tongues glory in each other. Abruptly, Christian kneels up, leaving me breathless and wanting more.**

" **You are so beautiful...** my love. **You have such lovely legs. I want to kiss every inch of them. Starting here." He presses his lips against my big toe and then grazes the pad with his teeth. Everything south of my waistline convulses,** My inner-goddess reminds me of my resolution to become his seductress and gives me a nudge. I wiggle beneath him as he pushes up the robe and his tongue licks my clit. Oooh, God!

"Ms. Steele, stay still, " **he warns, and suddenly, he flips me onto my stomach and continues his leisurely journey with his mouth up to the backs of my legs, to my thighs, my behind, and then he stops. I groan.** My inner-goddess elbows me in the gut. You? A seductress? She's making fun of me now. He's got you right where he wants you.

" **Please!"**

" **I want you naked," he murmurs,** peeling the robe off me. He's almost lying on top of me, and I can feel him hard against my behind.

"What do you want, Ana?"

"You." I say breathlessly.

 **He stands swiftly, and in one efficient move, he dispenses with his pants and boxer briefs** and was about to climb back on the bed when I SEIZE THE MOMENT and meet him halfway across the bed on my knees. And I can tell he wasn't expecting that. But he's a good sport and crawls on his knees to meet me, and **he's gloriously naked and looming large,** and he crashes his lips against mine, and I nearly lose sight of my resolutions.

I pull back, and he gives me a questioning look. I waste no time and give him a blow job that leaves him weak and wanting. I feel my sex getting dripping wet just from knowing what I can do to him."On your back, Mr. Grey." I say, and it surprises me when he complies. He folds his hands under the back of his head and regards me with an amused expression.

"Ah," he groans when I slowly lower myself into his erection and start riding him at my leisure. I'm so into it, I pump, thrust and grind. I lean forward, and he grabs my tits, pulling painfully at my nipples. I moan and curse and yes, yes, he comes inside of me. I ride some more chasing my own orgasm, rubbing my clit with my hand and I contract inside, and I explode into a million pieces. I try to hold him a little bit longer, but he's shrinking. He slips out, and I can tell he's disappointed.

"That was amazing," I say leaning my head against his chest. He puts his arm around me and kisses my forehead.

"I came before you." He whispers with regret.

Oh, my poor fifty. I know. You're just so used to being in control, you're so used to having everything going your way. And you always make sure I have my come first, two or three times even. I don't say any of this, of course.

"It was absolutely amazing," I reiterate, pulling back so I can look into his gorgeous eyes.

He says nothing, but I have the feeling that he's still unhappy. I kiss his earlobe and his lips and tell him how much I love him. At last, he smiles, tells me he loves me. Shortly after that, we fall asleep in each other's arms and stay like that for the rest of the night.

…...

The next morning we wake up to the annoying sound of a phone notification. A groggy Christian reaches over his nightstand and squints at the bright screen.

"Shit. I forgot about breakfast." He looks at me and then at the clock. We clearly overslept, even for a Sunday. "Everyone 's already downstairs waiting for us."

It takes me a moment to remember that the Greys and Kate were coming over this morning. I waste no time getting out of bed and heading for the bathroom. When I return to the bedroom fifteen minutes later wearing a bathrobe, Christian is dressed in a dark pair of jeans and a light cotton shirt. His hair looks wet so he must have just showered. Boy, my Fifty looks hot.

"It will only take me a minute to get dressed," I say as I go into the walk-in closet. "But you can go downstairs and meet with everybody if you want."

A minute later I come back into the room, and I'm surprised that he's still sitting in the same spot in the armchair next to the bed.

"Is everything okay?"

He takes forever to respond. "What are we going to say...about us?" I give him a quizzical look, and he adds, "as far as everyone is concerned, we're still engaged."

I bite my lip and he narrows his eyes. "We're still together."

He shakes his head. **"It's not enough.** "

"Not...not enough?"

" **I want everyone to know that you're mine."**

 **A/N:**

This chapter borrowed a little bit from from Freed, chapter one (page 22), and also from chapter seven (page 144). **All material straight from the book is in bold.**

I hope you liked this new Ana

.


	4. Chapter 4: The perfect Balance

**A/N:**

The dialogue **f** rom the breakfast scene in this chapter was taken from Freed, chapter 2. As always, actual quotes from the book are in bold.

 _dcschak12_ : Thanks for alerting me to the blunder/ typo in the last chapter. I will be forever grateful? Thanks to all who favorited and followed since the last chapter. I was pleasantly surprised to see more than 50 new follows! I've been ill, so your support meant a lot.

All mistakes are mine.

* * *

Chapter Four: A perfect balance

Ana POV

"It's not enough, I want everyone to know that you're mine."

He tells me, and I don't know what to say. We stare at each other for a long time, and then he exits the room.

A few minutes later, I'm dressed, standing in front of the full-length mirror. On the outside, I look well put together, my outfit impeccable. But on the inside, a jumble of emotions are ready to spill over.

Christian's words keep ringing in my head.

 _Not enough._

 _Why can't it be enough?_

Why does he always have to pressure me? And why do I always end up giving in? Face it, Ana. And I take a good look at myself. You're just too afraid to make waves.

Gail knocks on my door a few minutes later to tell me everybody's waiting. Christian sent her to see if I needed anything. I tell her I will be there soon and once again check appearance in the mirror. The reflection betrays nothing of my inner turmoil, I look fine. My nose is not too shiny, and my lipstick is just right. The dress I'm wearing is casual yet attractive, cream colored and with a sweetheart neckline. I decide to accessorize it with a bronze colored lightweight scarf.

* * *

Later

We are gathered in the informal dining room connected to the kitchen by a short hallway that had a long counter-top with bar-stools on either side of it. Gail has served breakfast, and we're about halfway through our meal.

Elliot just excused himself to answer the phone and Grace shakes her head in disapproval.

" **Look at this," squeals Mia** as she sets her mobile device sideways on the table, using a flower base to hold it in an upright position so that we can all see it. "There's a gossipy piece on the Seattle Nooz web site about you being engaged, Christian."

" **Already? Grace says in surprise. Then, she purses her mouth and Christian frowns.**

 **Mia goes on to read the column out loud. "Word has reached us here at the Nooz that Seattle's most eligible bachelor, the Christian Grey, has finally been snapped up and wedding bells are in the air. But who is the lucky lady? The Nooz is on the hunt. Bet she's getting one helluva prenup."**

 **Mia giggles. Christian glares at her, and she stops abruptly. Silence descends, and the atmosphere in the** dining room **plunges to below zero.**

The thought of a prenup has never really crossed my mind. I look at Christian. He shifts uncomfortably in his chair.

" **No," he mouths at me.**

Inwardly, I shake my head at the fact that he's now pressuring me once again in front of everybody to go along with the wedding plans as though our discussion on the night of his birthday party had never happened. Outwardly, I don't move a muscle. Going along with Christian's desires is the path of the least resistance.

Of course, everybody is looking at both of us, expectantly. I take a deep breath. It's now, or never...I'm trembling inside, but I remind myself that this _new Ana_ is NOT a shrinking violet.

"Christian and I have decided to postpone the wedding," I hear myself say in a voice I barely recognize as my own. Christian frowns at me, and I know that he particularly hates the fact that I have included him as though the decision had been made by mutual agreement.

"Ana..." He makes a low snorting sound. I can see the wheels in his head turning. He's debating whether to make a scene here in front of his family or just let things be and save his own ego in front of everyone.

Everyone at the table exchange looks of confusion. Kate gives me a wink of solidarity.

"Oh, dear," Grace murmurs, her face filled with disappointment. It's clear she doesn't know what else to say.

"We're thinking we need more time together as a couple before tying the knot," I add, playing with my knotted fingers under the table. "Marriage is such a big step, we need time to make sure we're prepared emotionally and spiritually."

"Yes, of course," Grace suddenly agrees. Anyone in their right mind would agree with what I just said, especially that last statement.

Carrick glances at Christian questioningly."How much time are we talking about here?"

"Yeah...how much time before the wedding?" Mia says.

I bite my lip and turn to meet Christian's gaze. He's glaring at me. "I don't know... a year or two. However long it takes before we're both ready." I say avoiding Christian's gaze. I'm kicking myself for sounding so evasive, darn it, I should have had an answer prepared beforehand.

Mia looks like a five-year-old at the county fair holding a popped balloon."But... you're still getting married, right?"

"Mia," Grace admonishes, "you're putting Christian and Ana on the spot."

Everyone erupts into animated conversation including Kate who up until this point had remained as an observer on the sidelines.

" **Stop. Stop now"** Christian says, leaning over so only I can hear him. "You've said enough already. You've hurt me enough as it is."

I gasp inwardly. I never meant to hurt him.

" **Anastasia, if you leave me, you might as well take everything.** " He gazes at me, his eyes bleak. **"You left me once before. I know how that feels."**

" **That was different," I whisper, moved by his intensity.** In reality, **i** t could really go both ways **.** What if you **might want to leave me?" The thought makes me sick.** I love him so much.

He shakes his head in mock disgust.

" **Christian, you know I might do something exceptionally stupid-something you can't forgive."**

"Stop it. You're talking nonsense." **He gives me a pointed give-it-up look** , but I don't let it silence me.

I look at our guests just as once again, a silence suddenly befalls the group.

I feel like I got to say something.

"Grace, you and Carrick have such a great relationship," I say smiling, my gaze shifting between Christian's parents. "Can I ask you...what is your secret for a happy marriage?"

Grace seems particularly pleased at my question. "That's a question with no simple answers...marriage is complicated." She paused, searching her mind. " It definitely helps if you're compatible with your partner. But if I were two pinpoint the two most important factors, I would definitely say that a good marriage must have an abundance of love and an equal balance of power in the relationship. In the end, it's like a balance sheet. Assets and liabilities must equal out."

I nod. I love how Grace said that.

"I agree. The trick is achieving that perfect balance." Carrick says. "We've had our share of problems, Grace, and I. Thankfully, the scale has never tipped over to the other side."

"A perfect balance or an equal balance of power?" Kate asks. I make eye contact with her through the rim of my glass. This entire morning Kate has been watching me discretely, giving me a good dose of moral support. " It seems they're different concepts altogether."

"Of Course not. That perfect balance is different for everyone, and it's not an exact number. Every relationship goes through hurdles and struggles. But I believe that all issues can be resolved if both husband and wife feel they're making an equal contribution to the marriage." Grace concludes, looking into her husband's eyes. He responds by scooting his chair closer to hers and by wrapping his arm around the back of her chair to rest on her shoulder.

Elliot chooses this moment to re-appear with a "What did I miss?"

"Nothing much," Christian mumbles.

"But is it really possible for a marriage to be equally balanced?" Kate jumps in again. "It seems to me that in reality there's always going to be someone in the relationship that's going to play a more dominant role."

"Interesting choice of words," Christian mumbles under his breath, looking at me. With him, I always feel like the center of his attention, even when socializing with others.

"Of course there's no perfect formula." Carrick clarifies. "It's never going to be a perfect fifty percent. What Grace mean is that the relationship must be balanced within reason."

I nod, locking eyes with Christian. It seems like we're going around in circles.

"I don't like the term dominant," I say, surprising myself, just for the heck of it. Christian gives me another give-it-up look. He sits there shaking his head, his body turned toward me, wondering what has gotten into me. My inner goddess thinks this is a teeny bit fun.

"No matter what feminists say, the bottom line is that men have normally taken a dominant role. It's mother nature." Kate points out making eye contact with everyone in the group.

"You mean like a man carrying a woman over his shoulder, caveman style?" Elliot says with a smirk, his eyes focused on Kate. "Yep, absolutely."

"Whaaat?" Kate reprimands Elliot. "You wouldn't!"

Elliot's smirk turns into a wide grin. "Well...if it ever comes to that," he pauses to mischievously extend the suspense. "Of course I would."

While Elliot and Kate continue on with a private conversation of their own and Christian's parents walk the short distance to the kitchen and ask Gail for some coffee, I take a moment to think. I steal a look at Christian who's now busy finishing his breakfast and keeping his thoughts to himself, ignoring me for the moment. I can't deny that my feminine side has been swooned by Christian's domineering ways beyond reason. But there's also an opposing force inside of me (nurtured by Carla since birth) AKA the liberated female, who has felt –at times- like closing up shop and staging a hunger strike.

"Aggressive caveman style courtships, I'm afraid, are a thing of the past," I overhear Kate tell Elliot with a chuckle. "Oh, C'mon, Kate. Admit it, what women want more than anything is a caveman in bed."

I can almost hear Kate's thoughts. Even though she's trying to hide it, she's really enjoying Elliot' s banter.

I look back at Christian, and for a brief moment, I wish he had Elliot's sense of humor. My poor fifty is too busy wrestling with his own demons.

Carrick and Grace announce that they must get going, they're meeting friends at church this morning. Wow, look at that, look at the time, they wonder. I accompany them to the elevator and Grace takes me aside for a moment.

"Don't worry, dear. Take all the time you need," she tells me with a wink. I love this lady, she's the best mother-in-law to be anyone could ever hope for.

* * *

…...

NARRATOR POV

Grace and Carrick arrived at Seattle's Episcopalian church a few minutes late. They stood in the doorway to the sanctuary looking for their friends. As soon as they spotted them, they moved down the aisle to the front and slid beside them in the pew. The other couple nodded and smiled as a way of a greeting. The pastor was in the middle of a sermon about the power of forgiveness.

"He that loveth not the brother whom he hath-seen cannot love God whom he hath not seen."

Grace shifts in her seat uncomfortably. In light of what she'd learned yesterday about Elena Lincoln, the pastor's words sounded particularly poignant, especially when she stole a glance at her phone and realized that Elena's secretary had been trying to get hold of her. She put the phone away, determined to ignore the messages. There was no way she could possibly forgive the woman for betraying her friendship and trust, for seducing her son when he was still a minor. Maybe one day she could forgive her...but not right now.

* * *

…...

Later that same morning

Ana POV

Once again, we're back to the same conversation we started before breakfast.

"You said you wanted hearts and flowers. Remember I told you from the start that's not something I do?

I take a deep breath and let it out slowly. Of course I remember.

"I got hand it to you, Ana. In the end, I gave you the fucking flowers and yet here you are...not giving me what I want." He points out, resentment seeping out of his pores.

"Just because I don't want to get married in the blink of an eye?" I say. "The important thing is that I'm here with you...why can't it be enough... at least for now?"

"Because I want you, all of you." He hisses, pulling me into his arms. I put my arms around his neck, and we stay like that, drinking each other in. "You barely ate your breakfast," he suddenly accuses, throwing me out for a loop. "I talked to your doctor, Anastasia." He pauses, and **my inner goddess gazes at him in quiet, surprised speculation.** Fussing over my eating habits is one of his favorite ways to control me, but now, it seems like he's taking things to a whole new level.

"You've got to take better care of yourself, Anastasia. You're dangerously underweight, you have anemia."

Of course, I know this already, but I don't like hearing it from him. I think back to Christian's request that I get a complete physical with his personal physician. The request seemed innocent enough, so I agreed. I can't believe however, that Dr. Smith has shared my medical history with Christian.

"Everything is under control, Christian. I'm taking my vitamins every day, no need for you to freak out. Anemia is treatable, it's not like it's cancer."

Christian POV

"Your health is important to me, Anastasia," I reply coolly. "And you're wrong, anemia is a big deal, you need to take it seriously." I can't believe she's downplaying this. I had anemia when I was malnourished and living with the crack whore. She doesn't even have any idea what she's talking about. Why can't she see that I'm genuinely worried about her, that I care for her? That I would die a thousand deaths for her?

We're still hanging out in the kitchen. Ana is sitting on a bar stool around the kitchen counter. She pushes a small dish of salted almonds and cashews toward me.

" **You're nuts, sir,"** she says with a straight face.

I appreciate the way she's trying to bring some humor into our conversation. Still, I will be watching her like a hawk, making sure she eats right." **I'm nuts about you,** " I smirk. I take an almond, enjoying her little joke. I lick my lips. "Eat up. We're going back to bed."

"What?

"Eat. Nuts are good for you, especially for your condition." I watch as Anastasia eats two handfuls of nuts out of the palm of her hand. I serve her a large glass of water." **Drink up**." She smiles and drains the glass like a good girl.

I stand and bend over her. **"I'm going to make an example out of you. Come. Don't pee,"** I whisper in her ear. I hear her gasp. **"It's not what you think. Trust me."**

I hold my hand out to her, and she takes it. She can't resist. And I feel back in control. What happened in the bedroom last night can't happen again. I can't believe how weak I was allowing Anastasia to take the reins like that.

With that thought, I lead her back to the master bedroom. I let go of her hand and pull my t-shirt over my head, toss it onto a chair. I remove the rest of my clothes while she looks on. Her face is gorgeous, her skin positively glows.

But I realize she's biting her lip and grasp her chin to make her stop. **"That's better."** I go into the dresser and produce a pair of handcuffs. Her eyes widen, I love it. " **These can be quite painful. They can bite into the skin if you pull too hard."** I hold up a pair. " **But I really want to use them on you, now. Do you want to try them first?"**

She takes the handcuffs. **"Where are the keys?"**

I show her a small metallic key. Her voice wavers. I can tell she's nervous and excited at the same time.

"Do you want to play?" I say. I stroke her cheek with my index finger and she melts.

" **Yes."** She breathes

, and I smile.

"That's my girl. I lean in as if to kiss her. **"Good. We're going to use a safe word.**

" **Choose a word, Ana."**

" **Oh."** She takes off her scarf and flings it across the bed.

" **A safe word, Ana."** I remind her. She's panting hard already.

" **Popsicle,"** she pants.

" **Popsicle?** " I'm amused. "Interesting choice. Lift up your arms." She does, and I remove her sundress and toss it on the floor. She gives me the handcuffs. I put both sets of handcuffs on the bedside table and yank the quilt off the bed...

" **Turn around.** " I undo her bra and yank off her panties. **"Tomorrow I will staple this to you,"** I yank her hair tie and them gather her hair in one hand and yank so that she steps back against my chest, against my erection. I pull her head to one side and kiss her neck. " **You were very disobedient,"** I say thinking of the way she told everyone at breakfast about breaking off our engagement.

" **Yes,** " she whispers. She's so turned on already.

" **Hmm. What are we going to do about that?"** She doesn't answer. I stare at her intently. She's frozen in place. Aw. Yes. I braid her hair. **"I"m going to teach you a lesson."** I grab her by the waist, sit down on the bed and yank her across my knee so that she feels my erection. I smack her backside once, hard. She yelps and I put her back on the bed. **"Do you know how beautiful you are?"** Without taking my eyes off hers, I gather the handcuffs and attach them to her wrists. Then, I slip a blindfold over her eyes. I check her pussy. She's soaking wet. Yes, and we haven't even started. **"What's the safe word, Anastasia?"**

" **Popsicle."**

" **Good."** I snap the cuffs around the poles of the headboard. **"Now, I'm going to fuck you until you scream."** I pull back to look at her. She's absolutely gorgeous. I take a deep breath and feel as if everything is right with the world again. Sure, she backed out of our engagement. She's not changing her mind yet, but SHE'S MINE!

I have this need to have her say it, to have her completely fall apart and tell me SHE'S MINE!. I need to hear her say it. I start kissing her navel, and she's convulsing. I pin her down with my body so she can't move.

" **You're so beautiful, Ana."** She wrestles against the cuffs. **"You drive me crazy, Ana, so I'm going to drive you crazy."** I turn my attention to her breasts. Biting, sucking, rolling her nipples between my fingers and thumbs.

"Christian!" she begs, pulling helplessly on the cuffs. "I want you, now."

" **Oh, baby, that would be so easy."**

" **I want to see you."**

" **Oh, no, Ana. You'll feel more this way."** I flex my hips and push partly into her. She moves her pelvis to meet me. I withdraw.

"Ah, Christian, please!"

"Be still."

"Christian!"

" **Again"?"** I tease her, pushing partially inside, then I withdraw once again.

"Aw, please... I want you all the way inside."

" **Do you want me, Anastasia?"**

" **Yes..." She begs. "Yes, Yes!"**

 **"** Say that you're mine."

"I.m...I'm...yours," she murmurs breathlessly.

Something in her expression makes me want to connect with her at a much deeper level. In one swift movement, I pull off the blindfold and plunge inside of her. Something magical happens: I'm lost in her beautiful eyes. Her vulnerability mixed in with need and desire is a powerful combination. I sway, and she sways, it's a dance of the souls.

When I'm finally buried deep inside of her, she let's out a sweet moan, locking eyes with me, our connection stronger than it's ever been. She tilts her head back and pulling on the restraints as I hit her sweet spot. I then still and circle my hips bringing her pleasure. I ignore her pleas and continue to circle and then ease and out of her and then slamming into her again. She cries out in incoherent wails. I thrust into her deeply, the feeling is intense. Tears spring to her eyes as she tries to regain some control over her imminent orgasm, but she can't move. There's hardly any wiggle room between her head and the headboard, and she has nowhere to go. **"That's it, feel it, baby,"** I growl. She detonates around me, round and round, screaming loudly. It's as though she's scorching through wildfire, I had never seen her like this before. Tears are streaming down her face, and she looks absolutely gorgeous.

YES! SHE'S MINE!

When it's all over, I kiss her nose, her eyes, her cheeks. I kiss away every single one of her tears, clutching her face between my hands.

"I love you, Ms. Steele," I breathe. **Even though you make me so mad-I feel so alive with you."**

 **A/N**

This last scene (written from Christian's POV) is different from the original in that there are no feet restraints, and the fact that he removes the blindfold and they look into each other's eyes. Also, here he demands, "say that you're mine."

How long do you think it will be before Elena is found?


	5. Chapter 5 The big Surprise

**A/N:**

Sorry for the long delay. I normally don't let hateful comments get to me (especially if it's just one person), but this time I did. I couldn't write anything for this story for the longest time. Anyway, here I am.

Keep in mind when you read this chapter that almost everything that's happening between A & C follows the book except for the lovemaking scenes that I've already changed so far. Also, the scene where Ana takes her bikini top off doesn't happen since in Freed they were on their honeymoon and HERE they're not married. If you have any questions about anything, let me know as there may be a detail I've forgotten and it gives me the chance to fix them. I will do my best to reply directly to you. Thanks for bearing with me.

If you want to follow along in the book, this chapter starts with page 40. Because so much of the first scene here follows the book, I did not highlight it in bold. I did change the wording in some places though. Sorry, this note was so long, but all of it was necessary.

* * *

…...

Chapter Five: The Big Surprise

ANA POV

A pressing need from my bladder wakes me. When I open my eyes, I'm disoriented. It's dark. The clock tells me it's 1:00 am. Christian is beside me, working on his laptop, casually dressed in his favorite string pants and t-shirt. His hair is still wet from the shower, and his man-caved scented body wash hits my nostrils. Hmm.

Three days. It's been three days since Christian's birthday party and since I called off the engagement. I tell you, the last three days have been anything but boring.

"Hi," he murmurs, gazing down at me.

"Hi," I smile, feeling suddenly shy. I must have fallen asleep while he was in the shower. "Are you ready to call it a night?"

"Hmm.." He closes his laptop and says, " That's not exactly what I had in mind," he grins suggestively. Holy cow, this man is truly insatiable.

When I open my eyes again it's daytime, shortly after 7 am, the sun's brightness squeezes through even though the blinds are closed. I stretch, feeling stiff. Christian opens his eyes and just stares at me. I rise gingerly, needing the bathroom. Grabbing my silk robe, I hastily put it on. Why am I so shy? I feel Christian's eyes on me, his brow furrowed. I absentmindedly wash my hands in the vanity unit, recalling our last sexual event from last night. My robe falls open as I stand in front of the mirror, shocked. Holy fuck! What has he done to me?"

The first time we made love last night, he'd been so loving and tender, but then, the second time, he went mercurial on me and threw in a pair of handcuffs and 'popsicle' as my safe-word. I gaze in horror at the red marks all over my breasts as our middle of the night rough sex scene comes to mind. Hickeys! I have hickeys! How did I not feel him doing this to me?. I flush. I gape at my reflection. My wrists have red welts around them from the handcuffs. No doubt they'll bruise. I examine my ankles—more welts. Holly hell, I look like I've been in some sort of accident. My body is so different these days. It's changed subtly since I've known him...I've become leaner and fitter, and my hair is glossy and well cut. My nails are manicures, my feet pedicured, my eyebrows threaded and beautifully shaped. For the first time in my life, I'm well-groomed-except for these hideous love bites.

How dare he mark me like this? In the short time, we've been together, he's never given me hickeys. I look like hell. I know why he'd done this. DAMN CONTROL FREAK. Right! Just because I called off our engagement and he needs to make sure the whole world know that I'm his? He's gone too far this time. I stalk out of the en suite bathroom and into the walk-in-closet, carefully avoiding even a glance in his direction. Slipping out of my robe, I pull on my sweatpants and a camisole. I undo the bra, pick up a hairbrush from the small vanity unit, and brush out my tangles.

"Anastasia," Christian calls, and I hear his anxiety. "Are you okay?"

I ignore him. How dare he? I seethe as fury spikes through me. Stepping back into the bathroom, I hurl the brush at him, turn, and leave-though not before I see his shocked expression and his lightning reaction as he raises his arms to protect his head so that the brush bounces ineffectively off his forearm onto the bed.

I storm out of the room and go to the furthest room in the upstairs which has a terrace. I take a deep breath as I gaze out into the clear blue sky. The healing breath begins to calm me. I'm aware of him behind me before I hear him.

"You're mad at me," he whispers.

"No shit, Sherlock!"

"How mad?"

"Scale one to ten, I think I'm a fifty."

"That mad." He sounds surprised and impressed at once.

"Yes. Pushed to violence mad," I say through gritted teeth.

He stays silent as I turn and scowl at him, watching me with wide and wary eyes. I know from his expression and because he has made no move to touch me that he's out of his depth.

"Christian, you have to try to stop trying to bring me to heel."

He shrugs slightly. "Well, you won't talk like that again in front of my family, making them think we both were happy to break off our engagement." He murmurs petulantly. "I didn't care for any of the feminist talk either." He says as though he's forgotten that Kate and Elliot clearly had a part in that conversation.

"I don't like you leaving marks on me. It's a hard limit!" I hiss at him, glaring. Nothing justifies what he's done to me.

"I felt mocked, especially how you said you didn't like the term dominant...it was as if all of a sudden, it was all a big joke to you. It was NOT a cutesy play on words. It was hurtful. I hated every minute of it. That's a hard limit for me," he growls.

I lower my eyes. "I'm sorry. I don't know why...I didn't mean it that way." His gaze softened a little, but I must make sure this doesn't happen again. "Look at me," I hiss through my teeth. Look at me!" I pull down my camisole to reveal the top of my breasts. Christian gazes at me, his expression wary and uncertain. He's not used to seeing me this mad. I want to shout at him, but I refrain. Eventually, he sighs and holds his palms up as if in a conciliatory gesture.

"Okay, I get it."

 _Hallelujah_!

"Good!"

He runs his hand through his hair. "I'm sorry. Please don't be mad eat me." He looks contrite. His apologizing like this is a biggie for me. I recall Dr. Flynn saying that emotionally Christian is like an adolescent and his emotional world is playing catch-up. Christian then jokes about me having a good arm and a good aim and how I always surprise him. I tell him I've had plenty of target practice with Ray.

"I can shoot straight... and you'll do well to remember that."

He smirks at me and tells me that he'll make sure all potential projectile objects are nailed down and that I won't have access to a gun. I smirk back.

He pulls me into an embrace and nuzzles me. "Am I forgiven?"

"Am I?"

I feel his smile. "Yes," he answers.

"Ditto."

We stand holding each other, my pique is forgotten.

"Hungry?" He says after a while, and I'm reminded of him snooping into my medical history and my anemia. I have my eyes closed and my head against his chest.

"Yes. Famished." All this activity has given me quite an appetite.

* * *

…...

"Why do you braid my hair?" I ask suddenly while we're having breakfast. We're sitting adjacent to each other at the table, my lower leg curled around his. He pauses as he's about to pick up his fork and frowns.

"I don't want your hair catching on anything." He pauses. "Habit I think."

I'm guessing it's a painful childhood memory and I don't want to remind him of that. "It doesn't matter. I don't need to know." I give him a warm, reassuring smile. Initially, he looks wary but then he relaxes. "I love you," I murmur and he smiles his heart-achingly shy smile, and I melt. "I will always love you, Christian."

"And I you," he says softly.

"In spite of my disobedience?"

"Because of your disobedience, Anastasia." He grins.

I take a bite of my eggs and shake my head. Will I ever understand this man? I take a sip of my orange juice, and I suddenly remember. "The other night you insisted on me not going to the bathroom."

"You really want to know?" He half smiles, his eyes a sport a salacious gleam. "The fuller your bladder, the more intense your orgasm, Ana."

I blush. Holy cow, that explains a lot.

After breakfast, he takes my hand and leads me to the entertainment room and turns on his iPod speaker on the dresser. He switches it on and selects a song. It's called Perfect. A man with a voice like warm melted caramel croons. Yes. His name is at the tip of my tongue.

 _Well I found a woman, stronger than anyone I know_

 _She shares my dream, I hope that someday I'll share her home_

 _I found a love, to carry more than just my secrets_

 _To carry love, to carry children of our own._

We dance. Christian dips me low, and I yelp in a surprise giggle. He smiles, scoops me up and spins me under his arm.

"You dance so well," I say.

He gives me a sphinxlike smile. I wonder if he's thinking of her, Mrs. Robinson, the woman who taught him how to dance and how to fuck. I had not thought of her in a while; Christian had not mentioned her since his birthday, and as far as I'm aware their business relationship is over. Reluctantly though, I have to admit, she was some teacher.

He dips me low again and plants a swift kiss on my lips. The track ends, and he murmurs, "come to bed with me." It's a heartfelt plea. I know it's his way of apologizing and making sure all is well between us after our spat.

* * *

…...

"You asked me why I braid your hair," he murmurs. His tone alarms me, he looks guilty.

"Yes."

"The crack whore used to let me play with her hair, I think." I don't know if it's a memory or a dream.

He gazes at me, and my heart leaps into my mouth. I don't know what to say when he says things like this.

"I like it when you play with my hair," I say, my voice hesitant.

"I don't like talking about all that shit. It's done. Finished, " he says quietly.

No, Christian, it isn't. The thought saddens me, and for the first time, I wonder if it will ever be finished. He'll always be my fifty shades...my fifty shades. I don't want him to change, but I do want him to feel loved. Peeking up at him, I take a moment to admire his captivating beauty...and he's mine. And it's not just the allure of his fine face and body that has me spellbound. It's what's behind the perfection that draws me, that calls to me...his fragile, damaged soul.

* * *

…...

Narrator POV

"If only I had paid more attention, I should have recognized the signs," Grace bemoaned.

"I think you're being too hard on your self," Carrick said warily.

"No. I don't know how I could have not known. I just want to put my arms around her neck and squeeze the life out of her."

Carrick is shocked to hear her say that. Deep down, he's not that alarmed about what happened to Christian as a teenager. Deep down, he secretly believes that boys will be boys and that perhaps getting to experiment at such an early age served a purpose. Possibly, being with an older woman helped their son gain experience, helped him become a man.

* * *

…...

ANA POV

"I got two gifts for you." He tells me with a boyish gleam in his eyes. "Which one do you want first?"

"Oh, Christian," I say, overcome with emotions. He sets a giant box with a red bow in the middle of the room. And then he sets a small square velvety box on the coffee table. The box is so tall that Christian is able to comfortably lean his elbow on the lid without having to crouch down.

And then pulls a small velvety box from his pocket and sets it on the coffee table. I stare at it, mortified, thinking it's another engagement ring.

"Which one will you open first?" He reiterates.

I hesitate. Wow. Two gifts. "Is it my birthday?" I smirk.

"It's mad hatter day, and it's about time we celebrated your unbirthday," he jokes. "Because really, there's no time like the present moment to show the woman I love how much I love her.

At last, I decide to open the small velvety box first. "Oh, my, it's gorgeous," I say. It's a platinum bracelet. It's exquisite, so delicately crafted, the filigree in the shape of small abstract flowers with small diamonds at their heart. It's wide and cufflike and hides the red marks. It's perfect!

"Only the best for you, my sweetheart."

"Thank you." I smile. I've never worn anything so expensive. I wonder why. Does he feel guilty? About what? The marks? About his mother? Not confiding in me? "Oh, Christian...you have given me so much already. I'm a very lucky girl," I whisper, and his eyes soften.

"No, Anastasia. I'm the one who is lucky. I'm the luckiest man alive."

I beam up at him. I admit, I can't wait to find out what else Christian has in store for me. "So what's in the big box?"

"I guess you need to come here to find out," he grins, leaning against the giant box.

I bit my lip and he frowns so I stop. I can't imagine what's inside. I hear a bark and I cover my mouth with my hands. Standing up on my tiptoes, I put my arms around my neck and kiss him. .. not for giving me the bracelet or a dog...but for being mine.

* * *

…...

Narrator POV

Ana stopped Gail in the hallway. "Have you seen Fi-fi?"

Gail opened her mouth to respond but before she could utter a word, they heard a bark.

"Did you hear that?"

The white Poodle ran into Christian's study. She cocked her ears, sniffed the air and in the next minute began to bark viciously. Gail and Ana found her sniffing around the floor to ceiling built-in bookcase. As soon as she saw them poke their head through the door, she started barking at the wooden paneled bookcase.

"Hey, what's wrong little one?" Ana crooned as if talking to a baby. She tried lifting her into her arms, but the dog was adamant. She wanted to keep sniffing and barking at the bookcase as if there was something there she wanted. Ana crouched down and rubbed Fi-fi' s ears.

Two hours later, Fi-fi was still standing guard by the bookcase. Ana was starting to get really worried. No matter what she tried, she couldn't get her away from the area. What was it about that bookcase?

"What's wrong with this damn dog!" Christian poked his head through the door.

"We can't get her to stop... sniffing and barking. She refuses to move away."

"There must be something wrong," Gail said mystified, in a tone of voice that left no doubt, the housekeeper ought to know.

"Maybe it was a mistake to get a giant poodle," Christian added. It had been Liam's (his shopping assistant/personal shopper) recommendation. When he had first proposed the idea of getting a dog for Ana, Liam came back from the pet store with three choices: 1) A bulldog (too ugly), a Pekinese (too loud AND tiny) and the giant poodle. Of course, the poodle was the best of the three choices, and Christian didn't have a lot of time to waste. He was excited by the idea of getting a dog and couldn't wait to see the look on Ana's face. But now, based on the dog's behavior in the last couple of hours, he was certainly questioning his choice. Who would have guessed poddles could be this loud and obstinate?

"Oh, come on, Fi-fi," Ana reprimanded the dog. "Stop acting like your guarding the scene of a crime or something."

Crime? Hmm...that immediately got Christian thinking about that intruder which had never been found. Hmm...maybe, just maybe...well, whoever said that giant poddles were not to be taken seriously had another thing coming, Christian thought as he started going through the books in the bookcase and handing them to Ana, who in turn handed them to Gail to set on top of Christian's desk. As he pulled out the books, he realized that the bookcase's backing was part of the wall.

Of course, Fi-fi had to be a showoff. She barked more furiously than ever to let him know that he was onto something.

"Gail, please go get Sawyer and Taylor." He said, this time leaning his back against the bookcase. That's when he realized that the back panel of the bookcase was in fact a swivel door. What the fuck? That thing nearly swallowed him up!

"Christian!" Ana screamed just as Christian stumbles inside and the dog goes batshit crazy. Holy fuck! Nothing could have ever prepared him for what he found inside.


	6. Chapter 6 Revelations

**A/N:**

 **Thanks for your lovely reviews! Welcome new followers!**

I've been studying Freed like a textbook, LOL. Still, there might be oversights and mistakes. Be kind; it takes a lot of time to study the book, THINK about which scenes to borrow and in what order AND write each chapter.

Like before, direct quotes from Freed are in bold.

Bits of the dialogue in the kitchen with Mrs. Jones can be found in chapter seven, pages 129-131.

C & A's conversation: bits taken from pages 166-170. The last scene goes back to chapter five, page 87

KEEP IN MIND THAT MOST QUOTES ARE ARRANGED IN DIFFERENT ORDER THAN THE BOOK (even those from the same page) AND THAT I PURPOSEFULLY CHANGED THE ORDER TO SUIT THE STORY.

* * *

Chapter six: Revelations

Narrator POV

Twelve hours ago.

She's running out of time, and there's no way to escape. Her heart and pulse are pounding, and vomit fills her dry throat. Her nails bleed from all the scratching she's been doing. Her body constrained, her mind terrified.

She remembers the good times; she never forgot the bad. So many memories and now they're all flooding back. She replays every moment of her life. From the first fight with her mother to every single one of the young boys she molested. Oh, how she loved them, sweet and innocent. She liked them young before Our evil society completely corrupted them. Christian had been her favorite, so eager to please and so easy to mold. Even after all this time, he was still her favorite; all he wanted was to be loved and accepted, and she had filled his every need. She clings to the memory of her sweet Christian. Oh, God, how she now wishes she could relive their moments together. She sees his young face, eager to please her

as she drifts in and out of consciousness.

Before she realizes what's happening, a wolf-like creature chases her into a forest. While she runs through the trees, she hears the terrifying sounds the monster makes while he's tearing down every single tree that crosses its path. She attempts to hide behind a thick tree to hide but realizing her mistake, she climbs up high, grabs a thick rope and swings from branch to branch, Tarzan style. The wolf snarls angrily and breaks each tree she sets foot on almost immediately. She panics and loses her grip, falling to the ground with a loud thump. The wolf slithers over to her and lashes with its jaws.

The air becomes really strange. It has an earthy smell like the smoke from a damp wood fire; it chokes her, it makes her gasp for breath. It's terrifying. She tries to scream, but she can't even breathe. Her head spins, and she thrusts her head out to take in gulps of air like a swimmer who has just surfaced after long minutes underwater. As she bites at the air, desperate to feel it fill her lungs, she feels the deep pressure of a hand on her shoulder pulling her down into The Great Abyss.

* * *

…...

Present time

Christian's POV

I still can't believe it. Elena is dead. I look away at the image of her lifeless body inside the secret room, clutching a key in her hand, the key to my desk of drawers where I keep all my sensitive documents. How she got hold of that key is a complete mystery. I still can't believe it. We're all standing around in shock.

Taylor crouches down to take her pulse, and he shakes his head no.

"Is she really dead? Ana wonders, a shocked gasp escaping from her pale lips.

"Sir, take a look at this," Taylor and Ryan bring out a medium-sized dark leather chest. They bring it out and place it on top of my desk. It has a white skull with crossbones painted below the lock and the words: Treasure chest painted on the lid.

"It looks like she tried to pick the lock with the key," Ryan observes.

I'm still in shock. Elena is dead, and I had no fucking clue this secret room even existed. However, I have the presence of mind to check my desk and find the filing cabinet unlocked.

The paramedics arrive shortly after. They try CPR and fail to revive her; they tell me they believe the time of death was between one and three hours ago.

Ana and Gail stand back, their hands to their mouths, frozen in time. Even as the paramedics haul the body away on a stretcher, I turn my attention back to the chest, it has one of those comically large locks swinging in the middle of the chest. Just like in the movies, except that there is no excitement in the air.

"Get me the best locksmith you can find," I murmur and Taylor nods. It's clear to me the piece is a collectible. It was probably made in the 1920s, very high quality and well made. It's very old and with obvious signs of use including a few scuffs areas and a couple of areas where the stitching is worn out but it's not coming apart.

I have to know what's inside this treasure chest and most importantly, I need find out the history behind this secret room. The fact that it's sound-proof makes me think that the hidden room was meant to be more than just a safe for valuables. I need to see Escala's original floor plans before the remodeling it underwent after I bought the place. I can't help but wonder if there were other secret passages and hidden rooms whose details had been omitted when the original documents were filed with city authorities.

* * *

The next day

ANA POV

" **What would you like to eat?"**

" **Something light...surprise me.** " He winks half-heartedly. I can tell he's exhausted from the aftermath of the discovery of Elena's body; all the phone calls to his parents and statements to the police and so on.

" **I'll see what I can do." I sashay out of his study and into the kitchen. My heart sinks when I see that Mrs. Jones is already there.**

" **Hello, Mrs. Jones."**

"Ms. Steele. **Are you ready for something to eat?"**

" **Um..."**

 **She is stirring something in the pot on the stove that smells delicious.**

" **I was going to make subs for Mr. Grey and me."**

" **She pauses for a heartbeat. "Sure," she says. Mr. Grey likes French bread, there's some in the freezer cut to sub length. I'd be happy to make it for you, ma'am."**

" **I know. But I'd like to do this."**

" **I understand. I'll give you some room." She smiles warmly and turns the heat down.**

" **So what does Christian like in a sub? I frown, struck by what I've just said. Does Mrs. Jones understand the inference?"**

" **Mrs. Grey, you could put just about anything in a sandwich, and as long as it's on french bread, he'll eat it."**

 **We grin at each other.**

I start searching for ingredients, and Mrs. Jones disappears. I think about how Mrs. Jones and I will share the kitchen. I can picture myself wanting to cook on weekends.

Fi-fi comes into the kitchen and barks a pay-attention-to-me kind of bark.

"So, is my little baby girl hungry?" I coo. She's just too adorable. I'm so happy Christian gifted her to me.

"There she is," Mrs. Jones coos.

"She's hungry, I think."

Mrs. Jones shakes her head. "She missed her supper last night. Maybe she's trying to make up for her missed meal." She doesn't need to elaborate any further. We both immediately recall how she had alerted us standing guard by the bookcase in Christian's study. She opens a can of _Royal Canin_ and goes into the furthest alcove in the back of the kitchen with Fi-fi at her heels to pour it into her bowl.

While she's doing that, I find a ripe avocado in the fridge and add a touch of lemon to the mashed avocado. Right then, Christian emerges from his study and saunters toward me. He wraps his arms around me, kissing my neck.

" **Barefoot and in the kitchen," he murmurs.**

" **Shouldn't that be barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen?" I smirk.**

 **He stills, his whole body tensing against mine. "Not yet," he declares, apprehension in his voice.**

" **No! Not yet!"**

 **He relaxes. "On that, we can agree on, Ms. Steele.**

" **You do want kids, don't you?"**

" **Sure, yes. Eventually. But I'm not ready yet." He kisses my neck again.** "As it is, "I'm already sharing you with the dog...we'll see how that goes," he says I smirk at him. "Looks delicious. What are you making?"

" **Subs," I smirk** once again.

 **He smiles against my neck and nips my earlobe. "My favorite."**

 **I poke him with my elbow.**

" **You wound me, Ms. Steele." He clutches his side as if in pain** and we both laugh.

* * *

...… **...**

"Ana, are you ever going to talk to me about that weird email I found?" Kate asks me one day while we're having lunch together at her place.

I sigh. I'm so sick of talking about Elena, the speculation and all the theories as to what she was doing in Christian's office. It seems like everyone's curiosity is never satisfied. Of course, Kate doesn't know yet how the e-mail and Elena are connected but still. "Can we talk about something else?"

"Ana, we can't keep ignoring the elephant in the room."

"Oh, Kate." I sigh. Oh, man. She's really not going to let this go, is she? "Okay, listen. What I'm going to tell you is very sensitive. Promise me you won't tell anybody."

Kate rolls her eyes. "Of course you have my word. Spill the beans!"

"Okay," I sigh again. "The email refers to this...alternative lifestyle and a contract."

"A contract?"

"Yes, when we first started seeing each other, Christian wanted to introduce me to his...alternative lifestyle." I pause. Kate is speechless. "Christian participates in dominant/submissive relationships, he's the dominant. Actually, I should say he USED to participate. He doesn't do that anymore, Kate. And that's really all you need to know. I know you read some outrageous stuff, but I want you to put it out of your mind. Whatever it was, it was in the past. I NEVER signed the contract. Something happened during the negotiation contract. We fell in love. I fell in love with him...he fell in love with me. I told him I didn't like the idea of punishments and he threw all the rules out the window." I kept talking even though I was aware of Kate dying to interject, but I wouldn't let her, not until I was done telling the full story; I didn't want to give her the opportunity to question Christian's lifestyle choices. "The bottom line, Kate, is that Christian and I have a loving relationship and he has NEVER been anything less than sweet and respectful towards me."

"Hmm...so you were never a... submissive?"

"Christian and I have a loving relationship, Kate," I reiterate. That's all she needs to know, really.

Kate looks at me incredulously. "But...did he ever try to hurt you?"

I know that Kate and Christian barely tolerate each other as it is and I can't add more fuel to the fire. "No, Kate. He loves me. He would NEVER hurt me." I say. I know I keep throwing the 'never' word around for emphasis, but I can't help it.

We're done having lunch, and I get up to bring the dishes to the sink. "So what you got for dessert?"

"Just the usual," Kate goes into the kitchen and serves two bowls of vanilla ice cream. She then brings them to the table, and we start eating in silence until Kate turns to look at me as something occurs to her. "And so, how did Christian get involved in that lifestyle?"

I hesitate. If Christian knew I was spilling my guts to Kate, he would be livid, but I can't live the rest of my life in a lie, and he had to know I would have to tell Kate something after she found the damned email. And the more we try to keep the bitch troll's deed under wraps the more power we give them to hurt us. "Christian was seduced by Elena when he was fifteen years old. I know, it's sickening. Elena being his mother's best friend, you know. Their relationship ended years ago, but I think she still wanted to keep her claws around him and used the excuse of a business partnership."

"Oh, my God! How old was she when she seduced him?"

"She was in her thirties, I think." We' re both appalled at the idea of a mature woman and a young boy. "She practiced the lifestyle."

"Does Grace know?"

"She didn't until his birthday party. That was the night when Christian first proposed and also the night we had the fight, and we had the intruder at Escala which turned out to be Elena."

"Wow." Kate was completely dumbfounded. "You got to be shitting me! How long were they together?

"Six years I believe," I say thinking this really puts Christian in a new light in Kate's eyes.

"But...how did all this come out at the party?"

"Elena was at the party."

"She was?"

I nodded. "She wasn't happy at the news of our engagement. She cornered me and told me I was making a big mistake in thinking that I could give Christian what he needed. Then Christian came in, and they had a verbal spat, and poor Grace overheard the whole thing."

"So Grace knows everything this woman did to her son?

"Hell, no. Not everything. She doesn't know about the lifestyle." I don't know why but I don't want to call it BMDS. "You can't tell anybody! Promise me!"

"I've already promised!" she complained. "I won't tell a soul. DOUBLE PROMISE!" She looks at her ice cream. It's all gross and melted. "I can't imagine what Grace must be going through."

"I know... and the saddest part is that Christian doesn't get it. He doesn't get how much damage that...that woman caused."

* * *

...

GRACE POV

I finally get another chance to talk to my son one on one. He's opening up more than he used to before Ana came into his life, but still, he avoids these kinds of conversations like the plague. It baffles me that he doesn't seem to understand how wrong it was what Elena did to him.

"Christian...I don't want to keep bringing up Elena anymore than you do. But how can you not see how wrong it was what she did to you when you were a child."

"I was a teenager mom, not a child. And that's a big difference right there."

"But you weren't an adult either. The legal definition of a child is anyone under eighteen. Besides, studies have shown that the brain of adolescents continues to grow well into adulthood. Elena was an adult, and she shouldn't have used her position of authority to..."

"Please, mom. Can we stop talking about Elena?" he says giving me a pointed look. "What's the use? She's dead. End of story."

"No, Christian, it's not over," I say dissolving into tears. I can't help the guilt, it's tearing me apart. "Think for a moment how I feel. I 'm your mother. I love you so much, I loved you from the time when you were brought into the emergency room. From that moment, I wanted nothing but to protect you and keep you safe. And then flash forward eleven years, and there you are going through the turmoil of adolescence, and I put you in the home of a trusted friend...and she has a sexual relationship with you...a married thirty-five-year-old woman and a kid...a KID!" I break down into ugly tears and Christian pulls me into a hug. I'm stunned. My Christian hates hugs but he gives me the warmest hug, and I'm a blubbering mess. "And I allowed this to happen...I should have known better. She was my friend, we were supposed to be sharing our hopes and fears...but I certainly wasn't paying attention! What kind of a mother am I!"

"Mom, STOP!" He pulls away and looks deeply into my eyes. "Nothing that happened was ever your fault. Listen. If it makes you feel any better, Elena didn't hurt me. She actually helped me stop fighting with you and dad...she even helped me get better grades."

"OH, God! Christian!" I wail.

He peers at me with a giant question mark on his face. It's as if he really believes that his getting better grades and his acting more cooperative at home somehow makes up for what Elena did to him.

* * *

…...

ANA POV

"Christian...you need to understand. The way she spoke...I don't know, it really got me thinking that she did have a point, that I would never be able to give you everything you needed."

"Bullshit. You're everything I need, Anastasia. You and only you. You fulfill every single one of my needs. You hear? It's what most people describe being in love. When you're in love with someone, only that person will do, and NOTHING else matters."

I bite my lip, and his eyes darken in reprimand. I stop immediately. "But what about all the kinky fuckery and the Red Room of Pain?"

"I think we're doing pretty well. I have no complaints in the kinky fuckery department," he smirks his patented-Christian-full-gigawatt smile. "And as to the red room...I don't need any of that to make me happy," he says sweeping me into his arms. "I only need you to be happy. Capiche?"

I smile back at him. Yes, I got it, loud and clear.

"Okay. Now that we settled that, we should get married." He says like it's a no brainer.

Oh, my, back to that again! "I still think we should wait." I brace myself for a Fifty explosion, and I'm surprised that it's not as bad as I imagined. "Christian. You have to understand what my childhood was like with my mother switching husbands at the drop of a hat. I need time...I need time to make sure I don't follow her footsteps."

"Follow her footsteps?" Christian throws his head back and laughs. "That's ridiculous."

"Is it really? Growing up with my mother left me feeling insecure...almost as soon as I started liking one of her husbands, it was over. And she went into every single one of those relationships believing 'it was it.' Honestly, that was the reason why I really didn't have any boyfriends before I met you... I was afraid...I only remembered the grief and the heartache. It left me with the feeling that I might have inherited her poor judgment. I didn't want to make the same mistakes she did so I convinced myself to just leave the whole tribe of men alone. It was easy...until you came along, that is," she smiled at him warmly. "You marched into my life like **a freight train.** "

"A freight train. Huh?

"Yes, a freight train **and I don't want to get railroaded,** " I say, my conflicting emotions resurfacing, " because **if I do, the girl you fell in love wit** h **will be crushed. I need to walk before I can run, Christian, don't you see? I want some independence** before we make the greatest commitment of all."

" **You feel railroaded? He whispers. I nod. He closes his eyes, agitated. "I just want to give you the world, Ana, everything and anything you want. Keep you safe.**

"Christian, I'm sorry. I should have discussed this with you plainly, but it never seemed to be the right time. I need to follow my gut here, and my gut tells me I'm not ready. Why is that so hard for you to accept? Don't you see? I don't want to have any doubts. I want to enjoy every minute of our engagement when we're both ready." I smile ruefully.

Christian's expression tells me my monologue has him half-convinced but Fifty being Fifty, he must play another card.

"What about me? What about my needs?" He counters. "I need EVERYONE to know that you're mine. **I just don't want you to slip through my fingers.** "

"Christian... **for heaven's sake, I'm not going anywhere. When are you going to get that through your incredibly thick skull? I. Love. You." I wave my hand in the air like he does sometimes to emphasize my point. "More than... than eyesight, space, and liberty."**

 **His eyes widen. "A daughter's love?" He gives me an ironic smile.**

" **No," I laugh, despite myself. "It's the only quote that came to mind."**

Christian continues to smile that smile of his, and it takes my breath away. I' m relieved. It sounds like Christian is ready to drop the subject. He leans down and kisses me.

 **"Do you know what this means to me? It means seven shades of Sunday," he murmurs against my lips, and he runs his nose along mine.** "But first, promise me you will start taking better care of yourself, and eat...and don't forget your iron supplement."

I roll my eyes, even though he's right in not letting me forget I have anemia. Although many times anemia can be a deficiency in a person's diet, in my case, it seems to have been more related to my heavy menstrual periods.

His gray eyes turn stormy, "Are you rolling your eyes at me again, Ms. Steele?"

"I didn't mean to," I say sincerely. I feel so loved and cherished by my Fifty. "I promise I will eat every bite and take my vitamins without fail, ok?"

* * *

… **...**

 **THREE MONTHS LATER**

"Ms. Steele, **I am very pleased to announce that you've put on some weight."**

" **What?"**

 **He grins. "So if you don't mind, we'll use the elevator." He narrows his eyes at me, though I know he's teasing.**

" **What do you mean I've put on weight?" I glare at Christian.**

" **Not much," he assures me.** "The important thing is that your iron levels are back to normal. So that's good." **His face darkens suddenly.**

" **What is it?"**

" **You've put on some of the weight you lost when you left me."** He says as we both step onto the elevator. A bleak expression crosses his face.

"I think both of us have learned a lot from the experience."

"If only you would stop defying me."

 **I test the waters.** **"I like defying you."**

" **I know. And it's made me so...happy." He smiles down at me through his bemusement.**

" **Even though I'm fat?"** The elevator pings to a halt at the penthouse.

 **He laughs. "Even though you're fat,"** he kisses me. "You've made me very happy."

Later that evening

Christian and I go into the kitchen holding hands. He's in a really good mood. Our relationship has never been better. I soon learn he's in a celebratory mood. He retrieves two champagne flutes from the kitchen cupboard and a bottle of chilled champagne from the fridge—our favorite, Bollinger. He deftly opens the bottle, not spilling a drop, he pours the pale pink champagne into each glass.

"Here's to us, Ms. Steele," he says moving to stand by me, handing me a glass.

"To us," I whisper. I'm conscious of more than just my shy smile. I hesitate. There's a long pause, I take the tiniest of sips and then a voice tells me I should NOT drink more than that. My period is two days late, and even though part of me has been in denial, there's this other part of me that doesn't let me forget. I look away, I don't want him to see how nervous I am. Oh, God. I'm so NOT ready for this. I set the flute on the counter and push it away from me. I take a big breath and let it out slowly. Sooner or later, I got to tell him.


	7. Chapter 7 Bright and Pink

**A/N:** Christian 618: Thanks for sharing your ideas with me, they really helped me with this chapter. We'll see more of Fi-fi in this chapter :)

References from Freed for this chapter (NOT in the order listed) : pages 90, 93, 123, 140, 142, 143, 146,147. **ALL QUOTES STRAIGHT FROM THE BOOK ARE IN BOLD.**

 **IMPORTANT: I changed the ending of the last chapter (the last two sentences), so unless you're a new reader, you will need to go back and re-read.**

* * *

Chapter Seven: Bright and Pink

ANA POV

He gives me a quizzical look. "Something the matter with the wine?"

"Hmm. I just don't...I think I have a bit of an upset stomach." I say. "I think I'll just have some club soda if you don't mind." I go to the fridge and fix myself a glass of Canada Dry mixed with apple juice. Christian doesn't seem to think much of this as he's seen me drink this before. It takes me about five minutes to feel better, and Christian is relieved. I tell myself this NOT a bout of morning sickness. I'm just under a lot of stress, that's all.

"I have a surprise for you," He tells me with a twinkle in his eye as I return to sit with him at the kitchen island. I can tell from his expression that whatever he'd been concocting is big. "Are you ready for the big surprise?"

"Another one?" I smile at him. My man is full of surprises.

He smiles back giving me his best boyish look. "I'm the new owner of SIP publishing." He pauses studying my reaction. My mouth completely drops open. "And you, Ms. Steele, are the new president of the company."

I choke on my drink. Wh-what?"

"That means Mr. Roach steps aside and you take his job." He clarifies. "Oh, and I'm changing the name to Grey Publishing, by the way. Kind of catchy, don't you think?"

Three months ago, the company didn't want the expense of hiring a new senior executive so it was apparently decided that I would take over Jack Hyde's job...I barely had time to adjust to my new position...and now, this?

I take a deep breath and let it out slowly. Holy cow! I can't freaking believe this. President of SIP/Grey Publishing. Me?

" **Christian, when I took this job, I'd only just met you," I say patiently, struggling to find the right words. "I didn't know you were going to buy the company** **."**

I can only imagine the disgruntled and whispered recriminations of my colleagues when they find out that Christian bought the company AND promoted me to CEO.

"I don't think I can do it," I say lamely.

"Sure you can, Anastasia. You've had what-three months as a senior executive? I'm confident that in that time you've learned enough to become president of the company. I believe in you, Anastasia."

"Christian! I **...I can't run a business! I sold paint and cable ties for three years, for heaven's sake!"**

" **I ran my own business from the age of twenty-one."**

"It's not the same. **Christian, you majored in economics before you dropped out. At least you have some idea what you're doing."**

" **Anastasia, you're the most well-read person I know.** You know so much about books...what sells, what doesn't, what writers think. Plus, you have three months of experience as a senior executive under your belt. **You're a very bright woman, I'm sure you'll manage."**

" **Are you crazy?"**

" **Crazy about you," he whispers** , and I snort because that's all I can manage.

" **You'll be the laughingstock.** Buying a company for your little -live in-girlfriend?"

" **Do you think I give a fuck what people think? Besides, you won't be on your own.** You will have Roach as your assistant for as long as you deem necessary."

All of a sudden, I let out a small, confused laugh.

" **Something amusing you, Ms. Steele?"**

"I was just thinking...the look on Roach's face when HE finds out that he now answers to me. It's not funny you know... It's just...weird."

His gaze hardens. He' s watching me as though there's something about me he can't fathom. "I thought you'd be happy, a step up in your career." He then drains his glass of wine. "And I don't like drinking alone."

I let out another inappropriate laugh as I'm reminded of my earlier apprehension-the fear that he would go ballistic if it turns out that I am indeed pregnant.

"So what if everybody thinks you got the job because of me," he says casually. "Don't mind what other people think. People are going to talk regardless, they're gonna think whatever they want. That's not something we can control. I wouldn't have gotten anywhere in life by seeking approval from others. If I had, I wouldn't have dropped out of Harvard...I wouldn't be here today by being a people pleaser."

"So I'm a people- pleaser now?" I can't help the tone in my voice.

A frown crosses his face and then his face softens as he realizes I've taken offense. "Being a pleaser can have its advantages you know. You need it to a certain degree to do business and get along with others. I'm just saying, you shouldn't let it overpower you... don't let over sensitivity to other people's opinions stand in your way."

I blink at his little pep talk. He's making perfect sense, and I'm finding it hard to argue his point.

" **I just want to give you the world, Ana. Anything and everything you want.** And I really thought you'd be happy. **"**

 _I know, baby, I know._ I feel a lump in my throat. _I love this man to the end of the earth and back. And I'm positively terrified. This is such a big change. What if I don't live up to his expectations? What if I end up doing something that causes a shift in our relationship?_

* * *

…..

 **Christian is singing softly to himself at the piano. Kate and Elliot are cuddling in one of the overstuffed couches, while Ethan, Mia, and Carrick are in a deep conversation about psychology, I think.**

" **I've never heard you sing, Christian, ever,"** Grace says when the song is over. The rest of the Greys stop talking and stare at Christian.

Christian sits at the piano stool, looking absently at her and after a beat, he shrugs.

"Oh, darling girl!" Grace grasps my hands and then suddenly folds me into her arms. "Thank you, thank you, thank you," she whispers, pulling me aside.

"Um," I hug her back, unsure of what exactly I'm being thanked for.

"Oh, Ana. I'm so happy. For the longest time, Christian had kept us at arm's length and now, look at him," she gushes. "He was always kept us at a distance, shutting us out. But now, you're both having us over almost every Sunday...and at last, I can say the change in him is permanent." She pauses. "The other day he gave me the most heartfelt hug," she sighs.

I follow her gaze, and we both look at Christian who started playing another song, this time an instrumental.

"But that has all changed since he met you. At last, my son is happy, at peace. And even though he still has a long way to go, he's starting to open up, I can feel it," she says excitedly. The happiness in her voice takes my breath away. "And it's all because of you, my darling girl!"

* * *

...

Christian POV

"Something is wrong with Fi-fi," Ana says, looking worried.

This is the second night in a row she says that and I roll my eyes. Honestly, I'm not terribly fond of the dog, and in more than one occasion, I 've regretted getting the darn thing and wished we could just take it back to wherever it came from. I swear Ana treats the pup like a baby sometimes and now, she's insisting we must have Fi-fi in bed with us.

But I have to draw the line somewhere. If it were up to Ana, she would be sharing her pillow with the dog. So we reached a compromise: she can sleep curled up at the foot of our bed but not an inch closer.

"Look at her," she lifts up the puddle and settles her on her lap. Her big brown eyes look sad and lethargic. "She's obviously feeling ill, and she's lost her appetite for sure. This is the second day in a row. "

Alrighty," I say, wanting to calm her fears. "let's call the vet." It's 10:00 O'clock at night on a Sunday afternoon and I don't want to drive to an animal hospital late at night, so I'm hoping to find a vet willing to make house calls this late at night.

"Oh, poor baby," Ana says, stroking the giant poodle, cuddling her in her arms while I look online and make the calls. I swear I hear the pooch make whimpering sounds; it's as if she's ramping up all the sympathy she can get. She's enjoying it for sure.

I couldn't believe my luck. Right away I found a veterinarian willing to make house calls after I offered twice the money he makes per hour at his clinic.

While we wait for the veterinarian to arrive, I notice that Ana had taken out a notepad and started sketching Fi-fi and making little captions and speech bubbles like a comic book. What had started as her list of questions for the vet has turned into a work of art.

ANA POV

"You have talent, Ana," Christian says admiring my illustrations of Fi-fi and the funny captions I wrote. "You should consider writing a children's book."

A great idea quickly forms in my mind. "How about a children's story about Fi-fi targeted to middle schoolers," I say remembering how I loved reading animal stories when I was that age.

"Yeah, maybe," I say.

Shortly after that, the veterinarian arrives and examines Fi-fi. He brought his own medical tool bag along with a doggy scale. The veterinarian is an attractive man in his thirties, and I realize as soon as he and Christian shake hands that this will be a one time visit only. Furthermore, he immediately takes over and does all the talking, barely giving me a chance to get a word in edgewise. Oh, Fifty. You're so insecure sometimes. You're jealous of Fi-fi AND jealous of any half-way attractive member of the male species that comes anywhere near me. And I'm worried. If this is any indication, then it would be fair to assume that you'll also be insanely jealous of the baby (if there is a baby that is). I quickly shut down the thought. I don't want to think about that right now.

"Well, it looks as though Fifi seems to have a bout of the common cold," the vet announces, his blue eyes shifting between Christian and me. "I'll order some blood work to rule out other possibilities just in case. But I really think it's a cold."

"Oh," I breathe a sigh of relief, putting the notepad away. "Thanks so much, doctor Adams for coming so late at night. When will we know the results?"

I will send the labs out in the morning, and we should have an answer early afternoon." Adams nods and smiles at me. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Christian glaring at the doctor. And then, he suddenly starts rushing the vet and ushering him out the door of our bedroom. "Just keep her warm and make sure she's drinking plenty of fluids."

"Doctor Adams, when are you coming back for a follow-up visit?" I ask.

The veterinarian stops, his gaze shifting between Christian and me. "You can bring him tomorrow at my clinic," he says handing Christian his business card. "Or better still, I can stop by tomorrow evening if you prefer."

Fi-fi lets out a perky bark as if in agreement with the last statement. She looks adorable with her two pink bows tied about her ears.

"Not necessary, doctor," Christian says. "We will bring Fi-fi to your office tomorrow for her follow up visit," he adds. "Goodnight, Dr." He shows him out to the elevator and assigns Taylor the task of walking him out to his car.

"Now, Christian. That was not necessary. It's not as if I was flirting with him," I admonish him as soon as Dr. Adams is gone.

"It's not you. It's him. He's the one I don't trust." He pulls me into his arms, and his fingers start moving into my hair and start playing with it.

"Ah-ha. I say lightly, smirking at him. "So I've been a good girl, then?"

 **Finally, I'm blessed with his reluctant chuckle.** "Yes, you've been a very good girl." He gives me that look that spells _kinky fuckery_ in giant capital letters.

 **"I still want to punish you,"** he whispers.

Oh, my! My inner goddess does a flip dance, and my panties end up getting blissfully soaked.

Thirty minutes later, we're in bed. We both lay there naked, rapt in post-coital bliss, our limbs tangled beneath the sheets.

"That was absolutely amazing," I mumble. Talk about absolute bliss. I lost count after the fourth orgasm. Fifi chooses that moment to climb on the bed and find her spot by the footboard. "I guess she figures it's bedtime," I chuckle. Truth to be told, we had both forgotten about Fifi in the throes of our passionate lovemaking.

Christian leans over and ruffles the Poodle's head. "Goodnight, Fi," he tells her. Fi-fi sniffs his fingers and gives him her best puppy-dog eyes. Christian can't help but smile. And I smile too, knowing that deep down Christian cares for Fi-fi more than he cares to admit.

* * *

…...

Sunday morning we take Fifi to see Dr. Adams. Yes, he opened his clinic on the weekend just for us. Thankfully, there's nothing wrong with Fi-fi she's just got a little cold. The visit turns out to be much shorter than yesterdays.

Monday morning, **Christian squeezes my hand as we pull outside of SIP,** soon to be Grey Publishing.

Christian is in good spirits. I wish I were nearly as optimistic. Sawyer opens the door. I squeeze Christian's hand once more before I climb out onto the sidewalk. As I head into the building, I give him a little wave.

Claire smiles at me from the reception desk and Hannah, assistant, follows me to my office. Hannah is tall and highly efficient. She's always been friendly to me but today she's looking at me differently, the reason, plainly written all over her face.

I'm relieved to find my latte waiting for me at my desk. I take a sip and try to engage in small talk, but I soon give up and get right back to work.

Just before ten Elizabeth comes in. "Hi, Ana. Just wanted to remind you of the meeting after lunch. Roach has a big announcement to make." She smiles, but her smile is forced.

The meeting lasts for two hours. All the editors are there plus Roach and Elizabeth. Roach stands up and announces my new position as head of the company and his own status as my personal assistant. He says all the right things and sounds respectful and professional, but his expression is strained.

There's a huge change in the way my colleagues are treating me, and I absolutely hate it. There's a certain distance and a deference, far worse than when I took over Jack Hyde's job. **And from Courtney who heads up the nonfiction division, there's downright hostility.** Her body language clearly states she doesn't think I'm qualified to run the business.

Shortly after that, I move into Roach's suite office which has its own in-office bathroom. Even though the office is more spacious and the desk is much more comfortable, I try not to let it go to my head.

As is our ritual on a Monday, Hannah comes into my office with a plate for my packed lunch courtesy of Mrs. Jones, and we sit together to eat our lunches. Hannah goes on to relate the company gossip, letting me know in no uncertain terms she's on my side. I'm grateful to have at least one friend at work. She wants to go on and on about Elizabeth and Roach, but I interrupt her. I can no longer keep hiding from this, and I ask her to retrieve her appointment book. She does as she's told.

"Hannah, can you check last months calendar? I believe I had an appointment with Dr. Greene two weeks ago and it was rescheduled..."

"Hmm...yes." Ana looks up at me nervously. "Actually, that appointment was six weeks ago, and it was moved twice after that."

"WH-what? Hannah...are you telling me I've missed three appointments?" I gape at her. This really can't be happening. Holy shit! Six weeks? "Hannah, get me an appointment with Dr. Greene this afternoon come hell or high water. It's an emergency."

Hannah leaves to call Dr. Greene, and I head to my private bathroom. I quickly pull out a pregnancy test from my purse. I've been carrying that thing around for days, putting off the decision making for when I feel up to it. All of a sudden, I must know, and I can't wait another second to find out. My hands shake as I take out the instructions and read them.

 _ **Please no, please no. It's too soon. It's too soon.**_ I mumble to myself. I'm shell-shocked. The test shows two unmistakable pink lines. I'm pregnant.

I wave the stick around, hold it up in against the light, looking at it from different angles, hoping it's just the lighting. But no, the pink lines ARE still bright and pink.

 **A/N:** I know y'all read many stories with Christian's reaction to the pregnancy ( I've only read a couple). Even though I have a plan **, I'm also taking requests as I want to write something different. Tell me what you want to see happening, what you DON'T want to see happening. This next chapter is critical for this story. Please help.** Your comments often spark new ideas. Often, the difference is in the details. Thanks for helping me write a better story and have a wonderful week.

…...


	8. Chapter 8 More Secrets

**A/N:**

Sorry, it's taken me so long to update. I was really stuck staring at a blank page for a long time. Long story short, this story will now be written in collaboration with Calicutie77 and when I mean collaboration, I mean lots of discussions, writing and rewriting and sharing ideas.

As always, words in bold are direct quotes from freed. It starts with page 149, and then goes back to page 129.

…...

Chapter eight: More Secrets

ANA POV

Somehow, after the initial shock has worn off, I manage to get back to work. I'm in the middle of typing a document when Hannah informs me Christian is here to see me. Holy cow! Just what I needed! I take a deep breath before answering. "Okay, he can come in, but give me five minutes," I tell her.

Boy, do I need those five minutes to compose myself or to freak out, or a combination of both! I shouldn't have taken the stupid test. My inner goddess must have been taking a vacation in the Bahamas.

Christian comes in exactly five minutes later, right after I convinced myself to go back to typing as a way to take the pressure off.

"I can't believe Hannah asked me to wait twenty minutes!" He fumes.

"Don't be mad at her. It was only five minutes!" I tell him. He's so pissed. He comes to lean against the desk facing me. He extends out his arm, and a quick movement of his fingers commands me to a standing position. I immediately comply, and his dark mood evaporates. "I needed the time, I was in the middle of an important document." I bite my lip nervously.

 **"You're biting your lip," he says,"his eyes darken...in that way. Oh, no- I know that look. Sultry, seductive, salacious...No, no, no! not here.**

 **"Don't even think about it, I warn," alarm clear in my voice.**

 **"Think about what, Anastasia?"**

 **"I know that look. We're at work."**

 **He leans forward, his eyes glued to mine, molten gray and hungry. Holy shit! I swallow instinctively.**

 **"We're in a small, reasonably sound-proofed office with a lockable door," he whispers.**

"Christian," I whisper. I have something very important to tell you. The words are right there at the tip of my tongue, but they're stuck inside my throat like crazy glue. I'm terrified to tell him, he will surely go ballistic. So I say nothing, and he starts kissing my earlobe, and we kiss, and I lose track of time. Besides, I need to make an appointment with Dr. Greene to confirm the pregnancy test did not give a false positive.

But I can't think about that right now, this Adonis of a man wants me, **my inner goddess glows so bright she could light Portland,** and right now, that's the only thing that matters. We start kissing in the center of the room and from my mangled, mushy thoughts, the only reality I can latch onto is that I'm the luckiest woman in the world. Before I know it, we're on the couch, our clothes scattered about. He pushes a finger inside and finds me ready. Hmm...He slams into me hard, and I arch my back, and he swallows my moans in one long sweeping kiss. I love having his cock inside of me so much, the pleasure comes in waves, and I can't help but continue to groan and whimper as I experience a mind-blowing orgasm. Oh, God, that's so incredibly intense maybe because moments before I'd been so weak with nerves. He picks up the pace and then suddenly tenses up and groans. His face contorts as he shoots hot semen into me and I shiver as I come again, the pleasure is less intense, but it lasts for a very long time. Afterward, I lay there in a happy anxiety state as I felt his lips on me and his hand resting on my stomach as if he somehow he knows about our little one—who must be really, really tiny, maybe like a blip.

…..

Later, as we're getting dressed, I realize that I'm more relaxed now than when he first came in. I even joke around and say we were so loud, everyone probably heard us through the soundproofed walls. Christian lets out a good-natured chuckle. And I'm still in a happy daze from our out-of-this-world makeout session. Even though it was brief, it sure was intense.

"Hungry?" He asks.

"No."

"I am."

"What for?

"Well, food actually."

"Let's have Hannah bring us a couple of subs," I smile a forced smile, and Christian blinks at the double meaning implied. Actually, the idea of food is making me nauseous, but I don't want him to think there's anything wrong. **My inner goddess is prostrate, well at least she's quiet.**

Shortly after, Hannah brings the sandwiches we ordered. I take mine and hide behind my computer desk and pretend I'm too busy to eat. He finishes his sub in two bites and starts nagging me about eating. Most reluctantly, I take a bite just to get him off my back. Oh, God, I'm just so happy! I was afraid the awful acidic feeling in my stomach would get worse if I ate, but I end up feeling better! Feeling encouraged, I take a few more bites without prompting. Christian is pleased.

"Well, surely, you have some work to do back at the office?" I say after a little while.

"Are you kicking me out, Ms. Steele?"

"Ms. Steele needs to get back to work."

"Back to work? Isn't that what you've been doing for the last twenty minutes!"

"Ah, Christian. I can't focus that well with you here."

"Fine," he huffs. "Your wish is my command, my lady." He pecks my lips and heads for the door, and I let out a big sigh of relief.

In the next instant, I push the intercom and ask Hannah to make an appointment with Dr. Greene as soon as possible. It is then that I discover my appointments with the doctor have been rescheduled three times. I cannot believe it. I don't hold it against Hannah, though. I was the one who kept asking her to re-schedule, and somehow it slipped my mind it had happened three times. My stomach starts acting up three hours later but Hannah brings me some saltine crackers, and I start feeling better again. The rest of the afternoon goes by in a flash, I'm too busy to think about anything but work. This is exactly what I need to take my mind off my upcoming appointment with Dr. Greene tomorrow morning.

...

Later that evening

Everyone has left the office but Roach and me. He insisted I stay since he had to show me how to run the business. I hurry to type Christian an email:

From: Anastasia Steele

To: Christian Grey

Subject: Tonight

Mr. Grey-aka boyfriend

I have to stay late at the office tonight. Blame Roach and yourself too since it was your idea to make me CEO.

Your hardworking CEO girlfriend,

Anastasia Steele

CEO SIP

…...

From: Christian Grey

To: Anastasia Steele

Subject: RE tonight

Dear Hard Working CEO girlfriend:

Love your enthusiasm for your job. However, I still expect you home for dinner at 7:30 sharp. Need I remind you of Fifi? She's still recovering from her illness, and she doesn't do well with changes in her routine.

Your caring CEO boyfriend

Christian Grey

CEO Grey Enterprises Holdings, Inc.

Ps. Just gave her a dog biscuit for sitting by me while I type this email instead of sniffing around everywhere, acting all hyper.

…...

Christian's email makes me smile for two reasons. First, he's warming up to Fi-fi, and I can't help but see this as a good sign; in my mind, it means he will also warm up to the idea of us having a baby. Secondly, it's just hilarious how he's managed to use Fi-fi to his advantage and get what he wants without appearing overly-controlling.

Before I know it, it's a little after seven. If I leave now, I can probably make it home before 7:30 pm. Just as I am about to pack up my bag, Jerry walks into my office. Thinking of this office as my office feels so weird to me. Just the other day this was Jerry's office. So many things were different just the other day. I am starting to feel overwhelmed by all of the changes. I look up at Jerry and smile.

"Hi, Jerry. I know we were supposed to work late…." I start to say.

"I need to show you something, Ana. It is something you need to see," Jerry cuts me off, which throws me off a little.

"Okay, just be quick about it, please. I need to get home," I say to Jerry as I grab my bag and walk around the desk.

As I leave my office, I see Sawyer already standing by the elevator. He follows us into the elevator. Jerry pushed the button that will take us to the basement. I begin to wonder what it is he has to show me. What is so urgent that it couldn't wait? The ride down seems to take forever, even though it is only a few floors. When the elevator doors open, Roach and Sawyer step out first. I look to Sawyer and motion for him to stay by the elevator. He gives me a displeased look, but does as I ask.

I follow Jerry down the hall past several archive rooms. When we reach the end, there is a door with a pin pad. Jerry enters a code, and the door clicks open. We walk into a small room which leads to another door. This one is a vault door with a handprint reader. My eyes grow wide. This is not what I was expecting to find down here. I start to feel more nervous about what is inside the vault. I can't help but wonder if Christian knows this is here. While I am lost in my thoughts, Jerry opens the vault door and steps inside.

"It's in here Ana. You are going to want to see this. I promise it will be worth it," he says, sensing my hesitation.

"Okay, show me what it is Jerry. I don't have much time," I say as I follow him into the vault.

Once inside, I look around and see drawers and shelves. Some of the shelves hold manuscripts and old books. There are some rare copies that I wouldn't ever imagine seeing. There is no way Christian doesn't know this vault is here. Some of these volumes are worth thousands of dollars. I continue to examine the shelves as Jerry opens a drawer and pulls out a box. I move closer to get a better look at what he has.

"What is this place, Jerry?" I ask as he turns toward me.

"This is our rare book collection. It has been a hobby of mine to purchase rare books through the company. Since they were bought using the company, they don't actually belong to me," he explains, "This is a high-quality archival storage box made of acid-free board and used by most libraries and book collectors." He opens the box revealing a manuscript.

"Oh my," I proceed to move closer to better view the manuscript.

Roach smiles a rueful smile. "This right here is the manuscript to Ernest Hemingway's first story which was published in 1917 by a high school magazine."

I'm in shock. "I thought all of Hemingway's works were kept at the JFK library in Boston."

Roach smiles with a twinkle in his eye. "Yes, some. But not all."

"Who else knows about this collection of yours?" I ask, and Roach just looks at me, still smiling. And then, I realize that something much bigger may be at stake. "Was this manuscript stolen from JFK library?"

"How about we say it was misplaced and I came into possession of it. Now it belongs to you and Mr. Grey," Roach says with a grin on his face, and I immediately realize something is terribly wrong.

"This was stolen! We can't have this. You know that Jerry!" I start in a panic.

"Yes, and now you and Mr. Grey are in possession of stolen property unless you give me what I want. There is also the fact that I know about Christian's extra-curricular activities," Jerry lets out a laugh as he pulls an envelope from his jacket pocket.

I open the envelope and what I see shocks me. There are photos of Christian. Some of him with Elena, some at the club with a submissive, and some of him with his contracted submissives in the playroom at Escala. I feel the bile rising in my throat. My hands are shaking, and I begin to feel tears fall down my cheeks. I look up at Jerry and see his awful smile. He knows I am cornered.

"How did you get these?" Is all I can manage to ask without throwing up.

"Well, Elena was a wonderful woman. The way she could dominate was so skillful. I envied her for it. I was never the dominant type, but I was happy to submit to her. I know it doesn't seem like that would be my thing, but then again you don't look like you are a very submissive little lady. She went to Escala wanting to get something incriminating against you, but she only had time to get what she could on Christian. There have always been photos of her with Christian, but she could only use a few from when he was over 18. Anyway, she managed to break into Christian's files to snap a few photos of the pictures showing him using his submissives and sent them to me. By the way, I didn't hear from her again so I'm guessing her phone must have died."

"It wasn't only her phone that died."

"Yeah, so I heard," Jerry says shaking his head. "Quite unfortunate. Anyway," he went on without missing a beat, "these photos, the ones of him with his subs, those are something the public would love to see. Along with possession of stolen property, I'm sure this would ruin him. Elena wanted to make sure he paid, and I told her I was willing to help her in any way. She gave me access to everything," he says as he steps closer to me.

"What do you want?" I ask still clutching the photos in my hand.

"I need money. You marry Christian, and I can get all the money I need, but it needs to happen soon. I am not a young man, and I really would like to move someplace nice and warm. So, I want you to move the wedding up, say a month from now. No more than two months though. After that, you will have full access to his accounts. Once you have access, you with withdrawal 10 million dollars within 48 hours and drop off the cash at a designated spot. Once I have all the money, I'll leave with the manuscript and give you the photos to do as you please. If you tell anyone or try to go back on the deal, everything is released. So, what will it be?" Jerry looks at me. The grin still on his face. All I want to do is slap him, but I know that won't do any good.

"I can't keep this from Christian. Just let me tell him, and I'm sure he will give you what you want," I try reasoning with him, but he just laughs.

"I'm not stupid. His henchmen would be all over me in a heartbeat. They would find everything and destroy it. No, you will keep quiet. If you don't, the whole world will know how much he likes taking a cane to the back of petite women with long brown hair. They will even know what his birth mother looked like," he sneers, and I gasp.

There is a knock at the door, I look at my watch and realize we have been in here longer than I thought. I look at Jerry and nod before moving towards the vault door. Before opening the door, I pause and take a few breaths. Sawyer is outside, and I can't allow him to see me like this. If he knows something is amiss, he will tell Taylor, which will mean Christian will ask questions. I can't lie to him. As it is, I have trouble hiding the fact I am most likely pregnant with his baby. I don't know how I will make it through dinner at this rate. There are too many secrets.

 **A/N:** Not sure when the next update will be, thanks for bearing with me. I'm thinking now it will be another four or five chapters including the final one.


	9. Chapter 9 Seize the Moment

**A/N:**

As always, quotes from freed are in **BOLD**.

 _Credit for this chapter goes to Calicutie_ 77

* * *

Chapter Nine: Seize the Moment

Ana's POV

"I took a pregnancy test already."

Dr. Greene raises a brow.

"Yesterday," I add as if it matters. "And it was positive."

" **Have you been bleeding at all?"**

 **I frown. "No."**

 **Dr. Greene** considers this for a moment and **reaches into the drawer of her desk. "You know what to do with this," she hands me a small container. "The restroom is just outside my office."**

 **I get up as if in a trance, my whole body operating as if in automatic pilot, and stumble to the bathroom.** **I suddenly feel sick and say a silent prayer.** Please, let this be a false positive, just this time. Let this just be a case of the stomach flu. Why is everything happening all at once? Pregnancy AND Roach's blackmail. Last night, I was a mess, my mind continually wandering. Even Christian was concerned. He asked me if something was wrong at least four or five times.

 **When I re-enter Dr. Greene's office, she gives me a tight smile and waves me to the seat in front of her desk. I sit down and wordlessly hand her my sample. She dips a small white stick into it and watches. She raises her eyebrows as it turns pale blue.**

"Well, Ms. Steele. Congratulations, you're indeed pregnant."

I'm not surprised in the least. I was already expecting the results confirming my home pregnancy test. I already knew the chances of it being wrong were small; I am nonetheless disappointed. But not horribly disappointed, just mostly scared of Christian's reaction. I know deep down, he's going to freak. Despite knowing how much he loves me, I'm still afraid he will reject us both, me and the baby I'm carrying. I know that he would be a great father, but I also know how fucked up he thinks he is.

"Have you been suffering any symptoms?"

I stare at her mutely. _Symptoms? Yes. I have this horrible empty feeling in my stomach, and I crave saltine crackers once every hour._ I say nothing and Dr. Greene stares at me curiously.

" **We could do an ultrasound to see how advanced the pregnancy is."**

All I can do is nod to Dr. Greene. My mind is going a mile a minute, and before I know it, I'm lying on the table wearing a cloth gown. I barely recall changing and getting on the table. As Dr. Greene does the ultrasound, I try to focus on breathing to help myself relax and keep calm. My thoughts are interrupted by the doctor's voice.

" **It's too early to see the heartbeat, but yes, you're definitely pregnant. "Four or five weeks, I would say.** " **She frowns. "Looks like the shot ran out early. Oh, well, that happens sometimes.** **"**

 _Oh, well?_ I feel like shouting something at the woman. But I'm too stunned to say anything. **Instead, I stare dumbfounded at the blip. There is a tiny blip in my belly.** Tiny, so incredibly tiny.

She removes the wand and hands me a paper towel to clean up. **"Would you like me to print out a picture for you?"**

I nod. A moment later, I glance at the picture in my hands, and it suddenly hits me. Holy cow! It's real, this baby is real! **It's a real honest to goodness baby. My baby. Holy cow!** A baby. Mine and Christian's. I'm so stunned I stare at Dr. Greene, speechless.

 **"We need to make another appointment, I suggest in four week's time. Then, we can ascertain the exact age of your baby and set a likely date. You can get dressed now."**

 **When I emerge from the behind the screen, Dr. Greene is back at her desk.** "I'd like you to start a course of folic acid and prenatal vitamins." She says, handing me a leaflet of do's and don'ts. I glance at it, but the information doesn't register. She continues to talk while giving me a package of pills but I'm not listening. I'm in shock and overwhelmed. It isn't until then that I realize that the part of me that was in denial was larger than I had allowed myself to believe.

Dr. Greene and I shake hands. I'm moving about in automatic pilot mode. All I can think about is that this is too soon. I'm not ready to be a mother. I always thought I would be closer to thirty. I try to quell my rising panic as I murmur a polite good-bye. Before I head out the door, I take a moment. If I exit the building in this state of min, Sawyer will know something is off and talk to Taylor. That will just cause more trouble. As it is, I still need to figure out how to deal with the whole Jerry situation. I have a plan in my head, but this whole baby business could complicate things.

 **Luke's POV**

Something isn't right with Ana. I know something happened when she was meeting with Jerry. I never should've let her out of my sight. There is nothing we could find on Jerry to push him out of the company, but something about him has never set right with me. When I found out Ana had an appointment with Dr. Greene, I knew this was my chance to get her alone to talk to me. I managed to find a vacant office around the corner from the doctor. It didn't take much sweet talking to get the agent to allow me to use it for a couple of hours. Now to wait for Ana to come out of her appointment. I don't want to frighten her, but this is the only way I know how to confront her.

As Ana comes out, I can tell she is upset. I'm now wondering whether or not to proceed with my plan, but I stick to my gut. I take her to the SUV and take her bag from her, leaving the bag in the car. I keep hold of her arm and casually lead her to the office around the corner. I can sense how tense she is and that this must be a shock to her, but it is my job to protect her. If that means I have to scare her a bit, then so be it.

"What the hell is going on Sawyer!?" Ana screams at me once the door is closed behind us.

"You tell me, Ana. What is going on? I know something isn't right. I saw how you looked when you came out of the meeting with Jerry. Tell me what he said, Ana," I question her as she looks down at her feet and wrings her hands together.

"It's nothing you can help me with. Everything that is going on, it's nothing you can help me with." She replies as tears start to fall down her face.

"Fuck Ana. You got to trust me. My job is to protect you. Please, tell me what is going on. Let me try to help you out!" I raise my voice causing Ana to jump.

"I don't know what to do Luke. Everything is happening all at once. It wasn't supposed to be like this. He is going to leave me." Ana sobs as her legs become wobbly. I gently guide her to a chair and kneel in front of her.

"Just talk to me. Tell me what happened with Jerry. You don't have to tell me anything else, just let me know about that meeting." I plead as her sobs become less and less. I hand her a handkerchief, and she gives me a small smile.

"Okay."

Ana talks about the meeting with Jerry and the stolen property. She tells me what his plan is if she doesn't get him the money he wants. The fact that she thinks he is monitoring her in some way has me very concerned. I am starting to wonder if there is a mole in our own security or at GEH. Once Ana is done she starts to sob again. I've never been good around women crying, but Ana is more like a sister to me. I place my hand on her shoulder and try to comfort her the best I can. This whole situation is a mess. There is only one way I can see everyone coming out of this and I know Ana is going to fight me on it.

"You need to talk to Christian. He needs to know what is going on." I say to her as I move her hair from her face.

"How? Jerry might already know I told you!" She asks. I smirk at her.

"I have a bug jammer in this office, no one can hear anything we've been talking about. We do need to leave soon. I'll figure out a way for you to tell Christian. For now, we will keep this between the two of us." I reassure her as she stops crying and begins to compose herself. "We need to leave. I'm taking you back to Escala. You look exhausted."

Ana calms down and nods in response. We walk back to the SUV in silence. Part of me wants to drive over to Roach's office and snap his neck, but we need to figure out who he is working with before we take any action against him. I didn't want to frighten Ana, but this could be more dangerous than she thinks. I don't think this is just about money. I shouldn't have promised not to tell anyone, but I know it was the only way to get her to calm down enough to head home. Once Ana is secured in the back, I get in the front and check my phone. There are several missed calls from Taylor and a dozen texts. I don't know how I'm going to explain this one.

* * *

 **Ana's POV**

 **"Hi," Christian says warily as I climb into the SUV.**

 **"Hi," I murmur.** Tonight we're going out to dinner, and I don't know how I'm going to survive this. Just the sight of food makes me queasy. Plus the conversation with Luke has me worried that Jerry knows what I told him. Even with the reassurance from Luke, I still wonder in the back of my mind.

" **What's wrong?" He frowns. I shake my head** as Taylor continues driving to the restaurant.

 **"Nothing,"** I reply, trying to reassure him, but knowing I'm failing. I've never been good at lying, especially to Christian.

 **"Is work all right?" Christian continues to probe**.

" **Yes, fine. Thanks."**

 **"Ana, what's wrong?"** **His tone is a little more forceful.**

 **"I've missed you, that's all."**

Christian gives me a dubious look and takes my hand. **"Your hand is freezing. Have you eaten today?"**

I blush and shake my head no, afraid if I respond I'll let the cat out of the bag.

"Ana," Christian scolds me, annoyed.

"It's been a busy day. I'll eat at the restaurant, I promise," I say trying to placate him. All the while I'm thinking, **I haven't eaten because** at the moment I can only stomach saltine crackers **and because I know you're going to go bat-shit crazy when I tell you I'm pregnant.**

 **His lips press into a hard line, but he says nothing. I gaze out the window.** Tell him, my subconscious hisses. This isn't how I want to do this. I don't want to ruin the evening.

Later at the restaurant, I sit staring at the salad in front of me. I take a bite and then move the food around on my plate a little. All the while, I feel Christian's gaze on me. I can always feel when he is looking at me. I also sense the annoyance coming off of him due to lack of eating. On our way here, I promised I would eat, but now my appetite has disappeared.

"You need some protein, Ana. Here, have some cheese," he says passing me the appetizer plate.

The smell triggers a wave of nausea and I avert my eyes, hoping it will go away.

 **"Damn it, Ana! Will you tell me what's wrong?** Christian looks at me with concern. "Are you ill? I'm taking you to a doctor!" He pulls out his phone, ready to start typing.

I shake my head and take a deep breath. This isn't how I wanted to tell him this, but I have no other choice. I need to be honest with him. I am prepared for any possible reaction from him. Before I look up, I blink back the few tears that are threatening to fall. I look up, and it takes all the courage I have to say those two words.

 **Christian's POV**

"I'm pregnant." Ana says.

I sit there staring at her. For a moment there I'm not sure if I heard her correctly. Did she just say she is pregnant? That can't be right. PREGNANT? No. No. She's supposed to be on the shot for heaven's sake! We're not even married! My parents are going to freak out. She can't be pregnant. My mind continues to race. Ana's voice finally brings me back to the present.

 **"I know the timing isn't great.** I understand if this isn't what you want. I can raise the child on my own." Ana starts to say as I begin to realize what is going on. She thinks I will leave her and our baby.

"How?" It's the only word I can summon. My mind is still boggled from the news that I'm going to be a father. I'm not sure I'm capable of being a father.

She looks down at her lap, and I see tears falling from her face. "Dr. Greene says the shot ran out early. She said that it happens sometimes. I'm sorry."

I take a deep breath and run my hand through my hair. I knew something was wrong, but in a million years, I'd never guess this. Being a father isn't something I ever imagined for myself. I wonder if a child could ever love someone as messed up as me. Am I even capable of taking care of a child? A feeling I hadn't felt in ages comes over me, fear. I'm afraid that I'll screw up this kid. I can feel beads of sweat forming on my forehead. Instinctively, I move to sit beside Ana and take her hand in mine. She is my comfort, my solace. If anyone can get me through the fear I'm facing right now, it is her.

"You're right, the timing isn't the best," I say as lift her chin to look at me. I wipe the tears from her eyes and continue. "The thought of having a kid scares the crap out of me. I don't know the first thing about taking care of a kid. What if I screw up? What if I wind up making him or her as messed up as me?"

Ana's tears stop and her eyes meet mine. "Christian," she says my name. In her eyes, I see this unwavering conviction, and it pulls me in like a magnet. "We'll do it together. Every parent makes mistakes, and we will both learn from those mistakes, and as long as we have each other, nothing can stop us from being the best parents we can be."

"What if I end up making one fatal mistake-"

"We can't live in a world of what ifs, paralyzed by fear," she tells me, her voice strong and yet soothing to my soul. "Life is a journey we need to embrace one day at a time. "Just remember you're not alone, you'll always have me, Christian."

Her reassurance clears the fog of fear from my mind. Of course we can do anything together, I do believe that. I lean in and give her a passionate kiss. It feels like we are the only people in the restaurant. I pull back, giving her a moment to catch her breath. The smile on her face makes the room seem brighter. Before I know it, I take both of her hands in mine, and start talking.

"Ana, you've given me more than I could ever dream of. Your love, your heart, and now a child. My life before you was so dark; you are my light. I know you said it was too soon, but I can't spend another day without you being mine. You are what my life has been missing for years. You complete me. Will you marry me Ana?"

 **A/N:**

 _In this version, Christian does not get mad at Ana. Our new Ana seizes the moment and tells him right_ _away that the shot ran out early and it happens sometimes. And so his primary emotion is fear and not anger_.

 _There will be two more chapters and an epilogue for this story. Sorry updates have been so sporadic. I kinda lost my mojo but working with fellow writer, Calicutie77, has helped. I hope you've enjoyed, thanks for your support. Happy new year! XO_


	10. Chapter 10 Plots and Conversations

**A/N:**

 **I recently went back and edited the previous chapters.** I changed a few minor things here and there but for the most part everything is still the same, except for **chapter 5** where I added new dialogue ( Ana POV right before the last scene). **The only other significant change is in relation to the key to Christian's desk (chapter 2).** Originally, Christian had left his desk unlocked but now I changed it to show that Elena was in possession of the key and she used it to gain access to Christian's files. I highlighted the changes in bold in case you want to go back to ch 2 and check them out.

 _Many thanks to Calicutie77_

* * *

Chapter ten: Plots and Conversations

He just asked me again. My heart is racing. I can feel it in my head. Suddenly, the smell of the cheese that is still next to me on the table becomes overwhelming. My stomach feels like it is doing somersaults. Instinctively, I get up and rush towards the restroom, leaving Christian behind.

I rush to the first stall, not thinking to close or lock the door, and the little I ate comes up. I continue this until nothing is left in me. I hear an older woman scream when the door opens. I feel too miserable to laugh as Christian is berated by the woman for coming into the ladies room. He apologizes to her before rushing into the stall. I feel his hand rub my back and tears begin to fall again. I feel terrible for leaving him the way I did just now, but I didn't have a choice.

"Ana, are you okay? Can I get you anything?" he asks as he pulls my hair back and rubs my back.

"No, it's okay. The smell of the cheese was just too much for me. I'm sorry I ran off like that." I say and then begin to sob.

"Why don't we head home? You look exhausted. I'm sure Gail has something in the fridge we can heat up." Christian suggests as he helps me off the cold restroom floor.

"Yes, just give me a moment to freshen up." I look at Christian and smile as he wipes my tears away.

"Fine. I'll be right outside the door if you need me." He says before kissing my forehead and leaving me to clean up.

I move toward the sink and fix the little makeup I have on before pulling out my cell phone. Giving Christian an answer is something I wish I could do, but I still have doubts. How can I know that I am enough? He has done so much and needed things that I don't think I could ever give him. Then, there is the whole situation with Jerry. I also worry about what people will think. I don't bring anything with me other than my student loans. People will think I got pregnant and forced him to marry me. All the thoughts begin to make me feel light-headed, so I decide to go find Christian. I need to be in his arms.

* * *

 **Christian's POV**

As I help Ana into the SUV, I feel a pang of disappointment. She never gave me an answer. Is it possible that she wants to have the option to leave if I'm not a good father? Dark thoughts begin to fill my mind again. I get into the vehicle and look over at her. I should've known sooner that something wasn't right. She has barely been eating, and she always seems tired. I was already thinking it was another bout of anemia and wanted to start nagging her about going to the doctor again, but no. Pregnancy had been the furthest thing from my mind. I'm so focused on Ana and the baby inside her, that when the vehicle pulls into the garage, I have no memory of the drive home.

Ana is feeling a bit dizzy, so I carry her to our bed and lie down in bed beside her. Only then does Fi-fi climb in bed between us. My first reaction is to resent the intrusion, but then I mentally slap myself. I need to get used to sharing Ana before the baby came and, in some ways, I should consider myself lucky. I have nine months to practice before the big day. That is a long time from now, I think to myself. So maybe I should relax. Fi-fi got herself perched by our pillows, and I prop myself on my elbow to look at my sweet Ana.

"How are you feeling?" I ask, caressing her face with the back of my hand.

"Much better now that I'm laying down beside you...and Fi-fi," she says, stroking the top of the puppy's head.

"Good." I murmur and for the longest time, neither one of us says anything. We lay quietly, content with just being together. It is then that it occurs to me there was really no hurry to get engaged or married. Yes, Ana is pregnant out of wedlock, and there would be some talk if we didn't tie the knot right away. But who cares? I mean, really, it wasn't anybody's business but our own. Besides, this is the twenty-first century and not the middle ages. I imagine Ana's perfect figure swollen with our child and people staring at us, judging us. At once, I see myself becoming defensive and answering: _So what? We were happy, and that's all that matters._ "Ana, I've been thinking, it is not right for me to keep pressuring you. I want to marry you more than anything in the world...but you don't have to give me an answer right away," I hear myself say, surprising myself.

Ana gives me the most beautiful smile. She positively glows. "Oh, Christian...that is so thoughtful of you."

I smile back. "Well, if you're feeling better, I'm going to ask Mrs. Jones to bring you something to eat."

"Oh," Ana gives me an apologetic look. "I'm sorry, but the only thing I can stomach right now is saltine crackers."

I kiss the top of her head and tell her I'll be right back. I need to talk to Mrs. Jones in person. I don't know much about pregnancies, but I have a feeling Mrs. Jones will know what to do. Indeed she does. As soon as I tell her, she congratulates me and starts talking a mile a minute about all the different things to try for morning sickness. I am relieved and happy she seems to know what to do. She says that the first thing to try is Jell-O, which according to her is one of nature's perfect foods as it is rich in protein.

"Anyone who has spent time at a hospital will tell you they always serve their patients Jello after every single meal. And there's a good reason for that."

"I thought they did it to cheer people up...as in here's a nice dessert for you." I smile.

"Okay, there may be some of that going on too," Mrs. Jones smiles back. "But most likely it's because it's easy to chew and easy to digest."

I had to agree with that, and to my delight, Ana was thrilled when Mrs. Jones brought her a nice bowl of Jello in a rainbow of colors. I sit and watch her eat it with gusto and, what's more, it seems to settle her stomach.

"I have to say, there was this awful hollow feeling in the pit of my stomach...it was always there, but now it's gone," she murmurs, smiling.

"Great. Now how about Mrs. Jones makes you a sandwich?" I suggest. "Peanut butter, ham, and cheese?" As soon as I say 'cheese,' I realize my mistake. Ana's smile quickly fades.

"No, no. Not so fast. We gotta give Ana's stomach time to adjust." Mrs. Jones says. "How about we wait another hour or two before we try something more solid?"

* * *

 **Ana's POV**

Eating something other than crackers was nice. At the rate I was going, I felt like I would never be able to eat anything else. Thank God Gail knew what to do. I did some reading, but this is all still so new to me. Now that I'm relaxed in bed, my mind goes back to what I was thinking about earlier. Am I enough for him? BDSM played such a huge role in his life for so long. I know we have done some things, but I often wonder if he ever wants more. How bad can it really get? Even during the incident with the belt, I felt like he was holding back on me. I remember from my research that some people get off on drawing blood, but I remember Christian's contract and what his limits were. I take a deep breath and decide to be brave and just ask. How else am I going to know?

"Christian, how bad can it get?" I ask and let out the breath I was holding.

"How bad can 'what' get?" He asks quizzically.

"I know that you haven't been as harsh with me in the red room as you were with past subs, and I know I'm not your sub anymore. I just wonder how bad it can really get." I reply trying to hide the doubts running through my mind.

"Ana, that doesn't matter anymore. I don't need nor do I want that anymore. Vanilla with you is better than anything I had with any of my subs." He says, trying to reassure me, and kisses my forehead.

"You've said that, but I am just curious. I know there is a lot to the world of BDSM. You never really talked about it before."

"Yes, there are many different aspects to the lifestyle. Each dom is different. They have to find their niche, what they like and want from a submissive. Some just want to bind and have control of the submissive, while others are much harsher, they want to instill true pain. Some even will use a cane or a whip until they draw blood." Christian says as he rolls on to his back and stares at the ceiling.

I study him for a long moment. He's deep in thought as if this kind of harshness is something he has experienced firsthand. Could it be that he wasn't honest with me? Could it be that he likes to be harsher? Could it be that I really am not enough? The doubts begin to rise again. I blink back the tears and take a breath.

"How do you know about these things?" I ask him as I sit up a bit and look down at him.

"Elena… she liked to give out a harsh punishment when her subs would disobey or misbehave. She was a true sadist. The things she did to her submissives…" His voice trailed off, and I began to understand. He wasn't the one who did those things, she was. Then it clicks, she did those things to him. As if he hadn't been through enough abuse, for her to do that to a teen boy, a child, was appalling.

"She did things like that to you," I state and not ask. I can already tell by the look in his eyes that I'm right. She needed to break him so she could mold him to the perfect submissive.

"Yes, she was very harsh. There were times when I wanted to use a safe-word, but she wouldn't stop. She would continue to cane me. It seemed as if she was in her own little world. Her eyes would look lifeless as if she had no soul. I could be screaming for her to stop, but she would just hit me harder. Afterward, she would patch me up and send me home. It wasn't easy hiding the injuries from my family."

* * *

 **Christian's POV**

"You wanna know something funny though?" I ask as a thought just crossed my mind.

"What?" Ana replies.

"Sometimes she would lock me up in a dark closet for hours at a time and then she would leave the house. No food or water. I don't know why I kept coming back to her, it's like she had this hold on me-" My voice trails off. I forgot all about that until recently. It's as if I blocked out how bad it really was.

"Oh, Christian! That's terrible! There's nothing funny about that!" Ana gasps.

I give her a small smile before getting to my real point. "The funny part is that, in the end, she ended up locked up in that secret room, so she got to taste her own medicine." I also think it's rather ironic that she died clutching the key to my desk so I know she was snooping around in my files. The key was the greatest tip-off that there was a mole in mole in my security team. Ryan couldn't stand the pressure and eventually confessed which forced me to send him away on a forced retirement without severance pay.

"Christian, what she did was wrong. EVERYTHING she did was wrong. No person should EVER have to endure something like that!" She says to me. Fi-fi reacts to the emotion in her tone of voice; she curls up closer to us and lets out a sympathetic whimper.

I stare at the ceiling contemplating everything that happened with Elena, starting from the first day to when I finally cut her out of my life. She may not have had a physical collar on me, but in a way, she had a grip on me. I did whatever she asked for the longest time. I even allowed her to help me find submissives. She chose women that she knew would keep me happy, but nothing more. She never wanted me to find true happiness. She used me in so many ways. But was it really that wrong if I kept coming back for it, I wonder and start to run my hand through my hair. All of these feelings are hard for me to decipher.

* * *

 **Ana's POV**

Christian gives me a thoughtful look and, for the first time, I think he might be starting to get it. I take a breath before taking this opportunity. I know it could go either way. He could end up pissed off or he might finally understand how horrible she really was. How she took advantage of him and used him.

"Just imagine one day our little baby is all grown up. We've raised him with all the love and care in the world...and then one day someone comes along and takes advantage of his innocence, and we had no idea. How would you feel?"

"That was part of it too. Part of me felt I had done some pretty bad things...things I didn't want Grace and Carrick to find out. Of all the things I'd done, this would've been the most disappointing to them," he tells me. At this point, he's pretty choked up, and my heart goes out to him. "I thought I was operating under my own free will..."

"Elena was the adult, and she manipulated you into doing her will. No child, no person should have to endure all the things she put you through." I can no longer hold back the tears. I begin sobbing. "I'm so sorry you had to go through that." I weep as he sits up and takes me into his arms.

"Shhhh, don't cry. That's all in the past. You're my future. This baby is my future. I can't change what happened, but I can change how I live my life. You're all I need and could ever want. I was living in the darkness, and the moment you walked into my office, you brought in the light. Your blush, your smile, your wit, your way with words, your ability to see through me, it opened up my life. You're the light that has been missing. If I could spend every moment with you, I would do it in a heartbeat." He says to me as he sits up and pulls me into his lap.

As he says those sweet words, I begin to calm down, but the tears still fall. These tears are not tears of compassion, but tears of love. I find his words amazingly reassuring. Yes, I am enough. I am the only thing he needs. Fi-fi gets all caught up in the moment and starts licking our faces...well, mostly my face. We both laugh.

* * *

 **Jerry's POV**

The drive to the outskirts of Seattle wasn't pleasant. Driving through some of the rough neighborhoods kept me on edge, but this is where my partner said to meet. He said that we would be safer talking here than we would be close to my office. When I pull up to the abandoned warehouse, I worry about parking my Mercedes here. In the end, I know I have no other option. I park and walk into the warehouse through an open side door. My partner isn't here yet, so I sit on a chair and wait. I found a buyer for the books and the manuscript, but I need him to agree on the price. It isn't as much as we hoped for, but they are not a sought after black market item either. Thirty minutes pass before I hear a vehicle pull up. Part of me wishes I had a gun. I don't trust my partner, but without him, I wouldn't have this opportunity.

"Where the hell have you been? You were supposed to be here thirty minutes ago!" I say to him as he walks in.

"I wanted to make sure you didn't go to the cops, Jerry. You're a bit of a pussy. I had to make sure you didn't lure me here. So, what's the deal? How much did the buyer offer?" He asks as he lights a cigarette.

"I don't think you're gonna like it. For everything, they won't go over $100,000." I tell him and cringe when he kicks the chair across from me, sending it flying across the room.

"That's not enough! You know the manuscript alone is worth that at least! Did you tell them you know me?" He asks.

"Jack, I told them, but there isn't a market for these. True buyers won't touch stolen items. This is the best we're gonna get." I try to plead with him.

"Jerry, I need more than that. I can't get any work here because of Grey! Until Ana comes through with the money, I'm broke. We need to try another way. I'm sick of waiting. Grey needs to pay for what he took from me!"

"Jack, how do you suggest we do that? The books and manuscript are all we have! I'm in the same boat! Grey wants Ana to take over the company! I'm being forced out so he can give the company to his fucking girlfriend!" I stand and yell right back in frustration. I know Jack is right, but using the photos and waiting for payment is the only way I can see to make the money we need.

"Roach, there is another way, but do you have the balls to do it? It's risky, but together I think we can make it work." Jack replies as he takes one last drag on his cigarette.

"Okay, I'm in. Tell me what it is."

"We're gonna take the one thing that means the most to Christian Grey." Jack pauses and lets out a laugh. "We're going to kidnap Anastasia Steele."


	11. Chapter 11 A Beautiful Love Story

Chapter Eleven: A Beautiful Love Story

Christian POV

Early the next morning

I feel something soft and warm on his chest right before the alarm clock beeped. "Ana," I say with a smile. Hmm...She's nibbling on my chin. I open one eye and then the other. Instead of Ana, I see Fi-fi smiling at me.

Okay, that does it!

How many times do I have to teach the darn dog to stay at the foot of the bed?

Yuck! I wipe my chin of dog drool and promptly placed her on the floor just as Ana comes out of the bathroom.

"Oh, Christian, did Fi-fi wake you?" Her eyes dart to my bare chest, and she scoops up the Poodle in her arms. Even though she's still a pup, she's getting too big now for Ana to carry her, I'm thinking.

"Good morning, sweetheart," I smile at her. It's then that I realize that she has shadows under her eyes as though she's had a rough night. I narrow my eyes, worried, as it dawns on me that she's still under the weather. "How are you feeling?"

She lets out a sigh and climbs in bed. The look she gives me says it all. I feel guilty that she's this ill because of me. After all, I was the one that knocked her up, right?

"You want me to get you anything? Some water? Some juice?"

She shakes her head no. Fi-fi climbs in beside her and rests her chin on Ana's arm. "I just want to rest for a few minutes...before work."

"Just take the day off," I suggest, but she glares at me and tells me she can't miss work. I choose to just let it be for now. Something tells me she's not getting up any time soon.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Shoot."

"Can you take Fi-fi out in the yard when you go out for your run?"

Normally I go for a morning run around this time every morning. Sometimes Ana joins me with the dog on her heels.

"Sure," I say, my gaze shifting to the dog. I'm not happy about it, but it's a small sacrifice to pay to make Ana happy. I quickly dress and sit on the edge of the bed to put on my running shoes.

Then, most unexpectedly, as I turn to say something to Ana, Fi-fi comes around and unties my shoelace in one fluid motion. I shake my head and furrow my brow. That's gotta be her sneakiest move ever! And now she even has the nerve to return to lay down beside Ana, looking all cute and innocent.

"You won't believe this, Ana, but that dog of yours just untied my shoe!"

"Who? Fi-fi?"

"Yeah!" I furrow my brow, but Ana lets out a giggle. It's the sweetest sound to me right now considering how sick Ana is feeling right now. And so I re-tie my shoe.

"Come, Fi-fi." Even though Fi-fi is obedience trained, she's never been particularly obedient if you ask me, especially when it's me calling her. Since she won't move, I end up having to scoop her into my arms. "Ana, call me if you need anything," I say before exiting the room.

Afterward, I go into the kitchen and ask Gail to check on Ana in a few. Gail nods, giving me that don't-you-worry look I love. Then, I turn my head, expecting the dog to be right behind me. But no, of course not. I don't have time to play hide-and-seek. I'm a very busy man. I take a deep breath and let it out slowly, reminding myself to be patient. I'm going to be a father, I tell myself. And, as luck would have it, Fi-fi is here for a practice run. I should be thanking my lucky stars.

"Fi-fi!" I call out her name and look everywhere.

I almost give up looking for her when Gail appears with the dog at her heels, smiling. At this point, I'm fuming mad. I lost ten minutes looking for the dog when I could have been out exercising.

I glare at the Poodle before entering the elevator. I no longer care if she comes along, but she gets in the elevator in the nick of time.

"I know your tricks," I say, taking advantage of the fact that there are no witnesses. "You got Ana and Gail wrapped around your little paws, but I know what you're up to. You hear? Let this be the last time I find you sleeping at the head of the bed!"

Fi-fi's ears perk up, and she lets out a bark. I roll my eyes and walk off to the fenced yard with Fi-fi at my heel.

"My grandmother always said you attract more bees with honey than with salt," Gail says with a chuckle when we return from my morning run, "especially when working with dogs."

"I think what we need is a full-time trainer," I say going into the kitchen for a large glass of water. "How's Ana? I hope she can eat a decent breakfast this morning."

"I fixed her some tea. If she can stomach that, then we can think of something more solid."

I shake my head, and I must have looked distraught as Gail gave me a sympathetic look.

"She can't go on like this. It's not good for her or the baby."

"Don't worry, Mr. Grey. Generations of women have gone through exactly the same thing...not eating very much for the first couple of months. But you see, nature has it all worked out. Usually, the body makes up for lost calories in the coming months. In the end, both mothers and babies end up as healthy as pie," she grins at me.

* * *

ANA POV

While Christian and Fi-fi are gone, I send a text to Luke and tell him I'm sick.

" _I have an idea that will work."_ he texts me. He's being intentionally vague. He must be as worried as me that our communication is compromised. _"I will take care of it. I will have to ask the boss for a raise."_

It takes me a minute to realize that 'the boss' is Christian and that 'a raise' must mean he's going to tell him the truth.

A great sense of relief floods my system. Even though I'm still worried that Roach could still release the pictures if he suspects that Christian knows, I trust that Luke will know exactly HOW to tell and WHERE to tell him. I can't wait for this mess to be over with. It seems like we can't catch a break. With how I'm feeling, the last thing I need is to stress about this, so I decide to let Luke handle it.

" _Sounds good Luke. I don't think I'll be going to the office today. Do what you need to. Thanks."_ I hit send and set my phone on the nightstand.

I sit up, leaning against the headboard, and close my eyes. My mind begins to wonder how women have been doing this for so long and how they could ever want to go through this more than once. I've been so sick and miserable, I'm surprised Christian hasn't started calling doctors to come to check on me. I seriously thought he was going to drag me to the hospital last night. Being poked with needles is the last thing I want. I feel bad enough at it is.

It isn't long before Christian comes back from his morning run looking all hot and sweaty. In normal circumstances, I would have jumped into his arms, but I'm too sick to move. My stomach feels unbearably hollow and empty. So empty that now I'm throwing up bile. It must be written all over my face because the first thing Christian does is ask if he should be calling the doctor.

"I'll be okay... Gail brought me some tea earlier, and my stomach feels a little better. She's bringing me something to eat in a little bit."

Christian sighs and Fi-fi comes into the room. She jumps on the bed and tries to come to me, but Christian promptly settles her on the foot of the bed. After that, he goes into the closet and brings out a dark leather chest with a large lock. I immediately recognize it as the chest found in the secret room.

" Are you in the mood for a story?" He smirks and places it the chest on the duvet covers, a few inches away from where Fi-fi lays. Much to my surprise, she has fallen asleep. I look up at Christian and nod enthusiastically,

"Alrighty, then. I think you will love this story. It's about a young heiress and her lover, a young German fisherman."

Christian opens the chest and goes on to show me some pictures. "Remember the treasure chest we found when we found Elena?

"Of course," I reply. "You said you were going to pull up the original floor plans...you thought the secret room was not built as a safe for valuables. You thought it was built for a different purpose."

"And it was," Christian smiles rather charmingly. "The secret room was built as a bomb/disaster shelter. Originally it had ventilation which was sealed off when it was remodeled forty years later. It was then used as a safe, and the sliding bookcase was added around the same time. Anyway, it's the love story that makes the story unique."

I lean forward and look at him encouragingly.

"Picture this. It's 1942. They meet as pen-pals, oceans apart. He was in Germany, and she lived here in Seattle.

I smile at him. "I'm loving the story already!" I look at the enormous piles of letters. I look at the dates; they were written over the course of twenty years.

"And I haven't even gotten to the good parts," he smirks. "Anyway, it takes a long time, but eventually our sailor arrives in America. He left everything behind to be with the young heiress who had told him everything about her life except that she came from money," he pauses to show me a few black and white snapshots.

"All of this was inside the chest?"

Christian nods. "This is a picture of their wedding," he says showing me the picture.

"They look so happy."

"Their marriage only lasted three months," Christian said, and I can't help but wonder what kind of love story is this. "Wait, here comes the good part. After the fisherman arrives in Seattle, he asks the father for the daughter's hand in marriage, but he's turned down. It is at this point that he finds out she the sole heiress to a vast fortune. The couple then decided to elope. They had waited ten years to be together, and they had no time to lose."

I flip through the pictures and find the snapshot of a young baby girl dressed like a Disney princess. "Who's this? Is this their baby?"

"So impatient, Ms. Steele," he smirks. "Don't you wanna know what happens three months after they got married?"

"You mean other than them breaking up?"

"Breaking up? I never said they broke up. I said the marriage only lasted three months."

I shake my head, smiling. I'm enjoying the story, and it's taking my mind off my morning sickness. I sigh contentedly. I wonder if he's taking the day off work.

"Okay, Mr. Grey. Duly noted. So they didn't break up. What happened, then?"

"The heiress's family disowned her after eloping, and the fisherman continued being what he always was, a fisherman. One day he ventured out to sea and never returned. It was presumed that he was lost at sea."

I clicked my tongue in disappointment. "I should have known there was no happy ending. Well, she must have loved him dearly to save all these letters and mementos."

"Wait, the story is not over," he tells me, and now I'm more curious than ever. I'm so invested in this story, I want this couple to get their happily ever after. "You want me to keep going?" He asks me, and I nod, turning to my side in a comfortable fetal position. "Five years later the fisherman returns to find his wife living in her parent's mansion and married to another man. She had several children. The eldest, a girl, saves the letters and photographs. In her letters, the heiress identifies her firstborn as the fisherman's daughter."

"But wait...what happened after the fisherman returned? Why did it take him five years to come back?"

"According to the letters, he was stuck on a desert island out in the Pacific. The heiress married a man of her social standing but was unhappy in her marriage. However, she didn't leave her second husband." He pauses to retrieve one of the letters. "Listen to what the fisherman wrote:

 _Dear Eloise:_

 _I love you. I think of you every single minute of my day. And I understand the predicament you're in. You have little ones to think about. Rest assured, I will wait for you to be free again. I will always be here, love, Albert."_

"So he waits on the sidelines for her... because he doesn't want to break up their family? How noble!"

Christian smiles. "Yep. He waits another five years and then she's free. And yes, there's a happy ending, but it takes twenty years. They are finally together after a lifetime of waiting."

I left out a sigh of relief. "Wow. That's quite a story. For a minute there I thought Eloise's father had hired some hitman to get rid of the fisherman...or that he had locked him up in the secret room only to be discovered by his daughter man years later."

Christian lets out a chuckle. "Well, look who's got an overactive imagination! You really ought to try your hand at writing fictional stories."

I smile. "I'm amazed you took the time to piece this whole story together." He must have devoted countless hours going through all the pictures and bits of history. "You're a hopeless romantic, Christian Grey."

"It's you, Ana. I've become this hopeless romantic because of you," he says with a boyish grin and with a roll of the eyes as if he couldn't help himself.

"Hey, being a romantic is not a bad quality," I say, and he gives me a look that tells me he's not so sure about that. **"** How did the trunk end up in Escala? It wasn't around back then, was it?"

"You're right, Escala wasn't built until much later. I had Welch and Barney look through the previous owners of the penthouse. It seems that a woman lived here and had the remodel done so the hidden room would be a safe for valuables. "

"I bet she was the couple's daughter."

"She was. From what I'm told, she moved to a warmer climate to be closer to her family. I'm guessing the trunk was left by mistake. I have Welch trying to track down the family. I'm sure they'd like this back." Christian explains, and I smile at him.

"And to think, you used to say you didn't have a heart. I'd say you have a bigger heart than anyone I know," I say to him as I slowly move towards him and give him a kiss.

Right then, Gail knocks on their door, she's bringing me a cup of tea, jello and saltine crackers. I thank her profusely while Christian removes the chest and memorabilia off the bed and places it all back inside the chest. Fi-fi opens one eye with all the commotion and then goes right back to sleep.

After having a few sips of my tea, I start eating the jello as Gail and Christian await my reaction. I know they want to see me eat and reassure themselves I'm going to be okay. So I eat even though I don't feel like it.

"Mr. Grey and Ms. Steele let me know if you need anything else," Gail says before she exits the room and, since I'm feeling a little better, we go back to our previous conversation.

"That is a lovely love story. Thanks for telling me," I tell him while I finish up a pack of crackers.

"I thought you would like it. Besides, I thought the fisherman and I have a lot in common," he winks at me.

"It sounds like you've given the story a great deal of thought."

He nods. "I think it's helped me become more patient. Still, I love you too much to wait 20 years," he tells me with a thin smile.

I take a few sips of my tea and look into his eyes. I realize that deep down, he's feeling insecure about us. I love him so much. I can't bear the thought of him feeling like this about us. "And I'm not asking you to wait, Christian,...I love you too much for that. So let's not wait any more than we have to and get married," I say rather casually, surprising myself. "It doesn't have to be a big affair, just a small gathering, friends and family only would be best," I tell him with a smirk and his eyes widened unexpectedly in response.

"Anastasia Steele," he says grinning, "just so we're clear, are you asking me to marry you?"

"YES!" I reply, putting the tray down on one side of the bed and snuggle close to him. In response, he strokes my chin and looks into my eyes.

"Are you sure about this?" He asks in a playful tone. "Are you saying you decided to marry me sometime between last night and after you got sick this morning?" I shrug, smiling. After a moment, he asks, "Well then, are you marrying me because of the baby?"

"No, silly. I'm marrying you because I love you. Although I suspect that people will talk."

"So let them talk. It's none of their business."

I let out a chuckle and Christian gives me a bewildered look.

"What's so funny?"

"It's just that question..." I pause for effect. "It's usually the guys asking the girl that question and not the other way around," I say pecking his lips. "Christian Grey, I'm marrying you because I want to be with you for the rest of our lives. I didn't plan this out, you know, otherwise, I would have planned a romantic dinner..."

"Sh-sh," he whispers. "This is the best news you could have given me."


	12. Chapter 12: Tomorrow is Another Day

**A/N:** Thanks to Calicutie77

Chapter 12: Tomorrow is Another Day

 **Sawyer's POV**

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" I yell after getting off the phone with the guy I had tailing Roach. He met up with Jack Hyde. This is ten times worse than I could've imagined. That Hyde fucker should've been dealt with ages ago, but the boss is too smitten to see it. Now he is in cahoots with Roach. I don't know exactly what they are up to, but it has me on alert. I already planned to fill Taylor and Grey in tonight about what Roach showed Ana and his demands. Now that I know he is working with Hyde, I really need to fill both of them in.

There is an office building Elliot just finished construction on close to Grey House. I send Taylor a text asking him to stop by with the boss. I mention that there is something the boss might want to see here. I have photos of Roach meeting with Hyde, but I don't tell him about any of that. He said the boss wants to see the building so they will come by after he is done with his meeting.

It's after 5 pm. I'm pacing in the lobby of the building. I'm trying to remain cool and collected, but it is hard. I've become close to Ana; she's like a kid sister to me. When the SUV pulls up, I step outside and wait for Taylor and Grey to exit. Taylor gives me a look like he knows something is up. I take a deep breath before opening the door and following them both inside.

"My brother did a hell of a job on this place. He always does... so what is it you have to show us, Sawyer?" Christian asks as I walk over and open the door to an office.

Taylor and Christian both step in. The room has three chairs and a small table. I motion for them to have a seat and then start from the beginning. I tell them about Roach taking Ana to the vault and how she was acting after they came out. Then I tell them how I cornered Ana and made her tell me what was going on. Even as I speak, I notice Christian's fists ball up tight and the veins in his neck starting to bulge. I decide to bring out the photos of Roach meeting with Hyde last night. Christian is now pacing the room, running his hands through his hair.

"Why the fuck did you wait to tell me Sawyer? Your fucking job is to keep me informed of this shit!" Christian yells, and before I know it, and before Taylor can act, his fist meets my face. Taylor quickly comes between us.

"Ana was worried that Roach had infiltrated us somehow. I needed to arrange a place to tell you where we wouldn't be overheard. It's possible Grey House, Escala, and the cars have been compromised. I did this the best way I could, Sir. I haven't been able to find a mole, but you needed to know. Especially now that Hyde is involved, we need to come up with a plan. I can't do this alone." I say to him as I rub my jaw where he hit me. I refuse to apologize.

"Sir, I have to say, he did what he had to do. Now we have more information and can proceed with dealing with the matter." Taylor agrees with me, which shocks me.

"How? We have no fucking idea where Hyde is or what he is up to! How do I protect her? How do I keep my fiance safe?" Christian asks, and we both look at him a bit stunned. He just said fiance, when the hell did that happen, I wonder to myself.

"We can add additional protection. She won't go anywhere without at least two members of the security team. I also think it would be wise for Ms. Steele to work from home. Seeing as she has been very ill, it won't look like she is trying to avoid Roach. This will allow us to monitor the situation and see what happens next and if Roach and Hyde meet up again." Taylor tells Christian. I love how quick he can come up with a game plan.

"You're right. We have the upper hand. Set up the additional protection. I'll talk to Ana about working from home. If there is a mole, we need to find it fast. I need to keep them safe." Christian says as he collapses back into the chair he was in. "We need to get a person on Hyde. Bring Welch and Barney in on this. Taylor, take me home, please. I need to see Ana."

Taylor gives me a look, meaning he will be having words with me later. I make the arrangements for Welch and Barney to come to the office and fill them in on the situation. Barney tells me he will start going through Hyde's financials and see if he can trace his cell phone. Welch starts working on finding the mole. Once they have both left, I stare at a photo of Hyde. I promise myself that I won't let Hyde or Roach hurt Ana or Mr. Grey or anyone else ever again.

 **Christian's POV**

I can't get out of that building fast enough. What Sawyer just told me felt like a kick to the gut. Was Ana ever going to tell me or did she plan to keep this from me? If she was afraid we were compromised she could have informed me in a letter. I shake my head in disbelief. Is this why she agreed to marry me? So many questions are going through my mind and I can't help but feel betrayed. She didn't come to me when all of this happened. She told Sawyer, someone who works for me, instead of coming to me! I'm angry, hurt, and it's making me feel sick to my stomach.

The ride back to Escala isn't very long. Once the SUV is parked, I get out before Taylor turns it off. All I can think about is confronting Ana. She said she is feeling better today and was only sick for a little bit this morning. Instead of going into work, she worked from home. The elevator ride to the penthouse feels like it is taking ages. I've already taken off my tie and have undone the top button of my shirt.

Finally, the elevator opens, and I stroll inside looking for Ana. She isn't in the living room, so I decide to check the library. It is the one place she enjoys working. The other day she said that being around all the old books makes her feel at peace. I set up a desk in there for her to work and she has enjoyed it. I open the door quietly and see her sitting on the couch reading a manuscript. She is so beautiful, but right now I'm too angry to appreciate it.

"Christian! I'm so glad you're home, I've missed you so much." She says with a smile as she looks up with me. I can tell right away she is feeling better than she was this morning. She tries to take a step toward me but I back away from her.

"Christian, what's wrong?"

"What the fuck Ana? You've kept me in the dark!" I say loud and harsh, unable to hold the lid on my anger. "You just went and talked to Sawyer without my input. You just did it."

 **Ana POV**

At least he knows now. I didn't expect this type of reaction from him. The cold detachment in his eyes sends a shiver down my spine. The love that I saw this morning before he left is gone. I set the manuscript down on the coffee table and stand up. As I take a step towards him, he backs away from me and puts his hands up. He has never done this before. He has never pushed me away like he is now. I take a deep breath before I say anything. I can already feel the tears gathering in my eyes.

"Christian, I was scared. I thought we were compromised, that someone was working on the inside with Roach. I thought it best for Sawyer to handle the situation." I say looking into his eyes, but his expression doesn't change.

"How could you? How could you sleep next to me and accept my proposal while all this was going on in your head?" Christian snaps at me.

For a moment, I'm taken aback. His words and his demeanor are so painful to me right now. I love him so much. I was only trying to protect him. When I realized I couldn't do it on my own and Sawyer knew something wasn't right, I told him what happened. I thought I was doing the right thing. In addition, I'm also surprised to hear that to him, it wasn't me proposing to him this morning but me accepting his proposal.

"It's not like that...it was pure agony for me. I was driving myself crazy thinking about all the possible case scenarios...about the damage those pictures could do to your reputation if they got out because of one wrong move on my part. I just thought…" Before I can finish, Christian cuts me off.

"And that's exactly the problem isn't it? You thought too fucking much! You are a smart woman, but you can't fucking keep this shit from me! This is my life! My reputation! I am the one whose life would be fucking ruined if this shit got out!" He yells, his voice full of anger.

"I thought I was protecting you, " I protested weakly.

"I want your word; you will never do anything like this again. Never hide anything from me, Ana." He looks me in the eye waiting for a reply, but I can't look at him. The anger in his eyes hurts. I'm not sure he loves me anymore. I wonder if I should just go.

"I'm sorry. I won't do it again." I say just above a whisper, expecting a softening of his heart but his cold stare runs another shiver down my spine.

"I'll be in my office. I have work to do." Christian says before turning around and leaving the library.

I fall back onto the couch and let the tears fall. I blew it!Everything around me feels like it is falling apart. Not telling Christian from the start was the stupidest thing I've ever done. Right now, I'm not sure he will ever forgive me. Hell, I'm not sure he still wants to marry me or even be with me. If I wasn't pregnant, I'm sure he would've told me to get out of the apartment. The pain I'm feeling is overwhelming. What's done can't be undone.

After a little while, I turn on the TV, hoping to distract myself and sure enough, there's one of my favorite heroines from the past Scarlett O'Hara. In the final scene, she's a mess, she's begging for Rhett to forgive her.

 _SCARLETT: "I'm sorry, I'm sorry for everything," she weeps._

 _RHETT: "You're such a child, you think that by saying I'm sorry all the past can be corrected."_

 _SCARLETT: "Where are you going? Please take me with you!"_

 _RHETT: "No. I'm through here...You know what I'm talking about?"_

 _SCARLETT: "No, all I know is that I love you."_

 _RHETT: "That's your misfortune." He walks away._

 _SCARLETT: "What should I do now?"_

 _RHETT: "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." He walks off into the fog of the night. And just like that he was gone, gone with the wind._

 _SCARLETT: "There must be some way to get him back. I can't think about this right now, I'll go crazy if I do. I'll think about it tomorrow. After all, tomorrow is another day._

No matter how many times she watched this, the scene still gives me the chills and makes me cry like a baby. Scarlett tells Rhett she loves him for the first time and he leaves her. He waited a thousand years for her to love him back and now he doesn't care anymore. The ending suggests that maybe not all is lost? Maybe there's still hope in tomorrow?

Yes, tomorrow is another day, maybe it will be better, I think. I can still get him back. I'm suddenly ill, and I race to the bathroom. I throw up again and again until my stomach hurts and nothing else comes up.

 **Christian's POV**

I curse under my breath in exasperation when I realize I've been staring at the screen for the longest time. I'm reading all I can about the black market for stolen books and manuscripts, but I cannot concentrate. The conversation with Ana is replaying in my head like a broken record. I know she said she was sorry, but I can't trust her fully. She has to earn that trust back. And that's going to take some time. Right now, I'm so angry and upset. I can't think straight. It was a good thing I left when I did or else risk saying something I could later regret.

I didn't realize I've been shaking my leg under my desk until I felt something bump against my leg. What the fuck! It's the poodle with the hyphenated name messing with my shoelaces again!

"No!" I snap at her, tapping her on the neck to let her know I'm serious. But she wouldn't let go of the shoelace, she flights back. She bares her teeth and gives it a furious shake. Ha! "Hey, let go!" I yank harder trying to show her who's boss around here. She obviously thinks I'm playing a game of tug of war. It's exasperating! With everything that's going on right now, who has time for this?

I let go of the shoelace, it's slimy and wet. Fi-fi lets go the moment she realizes the game is over and looks up at me with a head tilt coupled with a look of confusion that could have fooled anyone but me.

"If you think all you have to do is look at me like that all innocent and cute, you got another thing coming! I decided it wasn't worth the trouble getting my hands dirty with dog slobber. But if I catch you messing with my shoelaces again, you're gonna be in big trouble!" I threaten her, but she isn't in the least bit concerned. She yawns and looks at me like all of a sudden she finds me too boring to deal with.

And with that, the poodle (now, why did I have to get the Standard-giant sized one again?) scurries off like she's got better things to do. I look at my shoelaces, all tangled up, a big mess and I just like that it occurs to me the solution to all our troubles, not being afraid to get our hands dirty.

 **Jack Hyde's POV**

My gut tells me that Roach isn't cut out for what I have planned, but I need him in order for this to work. I can't get close to that little prick tease unless she's at SIP, or whatever the fuck it's called now. Anywhere else would be too risky. When she's at work, she usually only has one person protecting her. Money isn't the only reason I want to take her, but I won't tell Roach that. He is a bit too soft in my opinion.

I hear Roach's car pull up to the new meeting place. The warehouse was too exposed, so I found an empty office building closer to the city center. The less I have to travel around, the harder it will be for Grey's men to keep tabs on me or Roach. This way it will look like he is just going about his day. Roach walks in and I motion for him to take a seat in the chair across from my desk.

"Are you ready to hear the plan?" I ask him as he fidgets in his chair. He looks nervous, so I make sure to keep my hand on the gun I keep under my desk.

"You're right Jack. This is the only way. I'm ready to hear it. What do you need me to do?" Roach says in a confident voice, and I'm rather pleased that he seems to have found his balls.

"The way I see it, the only time we can get to her is while she is at the office. During this time, security is limited to her one CPO. You can ask her to work late. Tell her a couple hours before she is set to leave that you need some revisions done. This way she will be there after everyone else has left. You'll make sure I have access to the rear entrance. I'll be able to come in and subdue her CPO and take her before anyone knows what is happening. It shouldn't take much time at all." I smirk as I lean back in my chair. I make a mental note to make sure I have enough sedative to knock out her CPO since he is a pretty big guy.

"How do you expect me to get you access to the rear entrance? Everyone needs a key card now." Roach asks me, and I roll my eyes. He can be such an idiot.

"Take someone's card from their desk before they leave for the night. Is that too hard for you?" I ask as he fidgets more.

"I can do that. People are always leaving them on their desks." He replies with a smile.

"Good. Once I have her, I'll take her somewhere secure. I won't tell you where just in case you're questioned. She will be safe, and I'll wait a few hours before sending them my ransom demands." I explain to him.

"How much are you going to ask him for?" Roach asks. He is such a greedy little bastard.

"I'm thinking, since she is pregnant, one hundred million dollars. I've already set up an overseas account for the funds to be transferred. Grey wants them both to be unharmed so he will be more than willing to pay." I look at Roach, and he seems giddy.

"That's certainly gonna set us up for the rest of our lives. How will I get my cut?" He asks.

"We will leave the country together. Once we are in a country where there is no extradition, I'll transfer the funds to an account of your choosing." I explain, and he smiles and nods.

We arrange for everything to happen sometime next week. Roach says Ana hasn't been back to work because of her morning sickness, but she did call him and let him know she was planning on being back in the office next week. I hate waiting to take what should be mine, but I know my patience will be rewarded in the end. That much money will make it easy to disappear after I take care of Roach. It's laughable that he believes I'll split the money with him, especially since he will be dead before he can get on the plane. Arrangements have been made for Ana and me to get out of the country on a freight aircraft. She will be secured in a container and given something to knock her out. The crew and the pilot has been paid not to ask any questions. I've saved money over the years from my previous 'jobs' just in case I needed it to escape. I pour a glass of whiskey and relax. Oh, yes, this plan will work, and to think that in just under a week Ana and I will be in another country.

 **Ana's POV**

My eyes open and I see that I have only been asleep for an hour. Feeling a little better, I get up and stretch, and I go find Christian. I can hear him talking to someone in his office. I really hate how we left things, and I want to make sure he knows how sorry I am. I splash a little water on my face and brush out my hair before going to see him. I don't want him to know I have been crying. I knock before opening his office door. He holds up a finger letting me know he is in the middle of a call. I feel like I should leave, but I don't want to hold off on his conversation. We need to finish what we started. I need to fix this.

"Ana, what do you need?" Christian asks coldly after ending his call. I fight back the tears I feel forming again.

"Christian, we need to talk," I say to him as I move towards his desk.

"We already talked Ana. I have work to do. I doubt there is anything more that needs to be said." He says without looking up at me. He continues to read the document before him.

I can't stand his cold demeanor anymore. I need to get out of here. I leave his office and slam the door shut behind me. Once I get to the bedroom, I go into my closet and quickly change into jeans, a sweater, and a pair of sneakers. I head into the bathroom where I look over myself. My hair is out of control, so I take a hair tie and pull it back. I grab an overnight bag and pack a couple changes of clothes, sleepwear, and other essentials. Then I head back to the library and pack up my laptop and a few manuscripts. Once I have everything I need, I seize my purse, put Fi-fi on a leash and head towards the elevator. Fi-fi is excited, she loves going out for walks.

"Ms. Steele, where do you think you're going?" Sawyer comes out from the security office and moves between me and the elevator.

"I'm leaving Sawyer. I want to go see my dad. Now please move out of my way or grab your keys and take me." I say sternly to him. I'm in no mood for this. I just want to get out of this apartment.

Fi-fi tries to show her loyalty and barks at Sawyer, but he ignores her.

"Ma'am, I've been ordered not to let you leave the penthouse," Sawyer says to me softly. I can tell that he hates having to do it, but Christian is his boss.

"So I'm now a prisoner here! I'm now trapped in this apartment with a man that won't talk to me! No, I'm leaving now! Get out of my way!" I yell and try to shove Sawyer out of the way, but he doesn't budge.

"Ana, please don't do this. Mr. Grey is just trying to keep you safe. Just give him some time." I hear Taylor say from behind me. I turn around and look at him. I can see he is sympathetic towards the situation.

Knowing that it's pointless to try and fight it, I drop my bags and run upstairs and into the guest room with Fi-fi at my heel. I lock the door behind me and throw myself on the bed. There is no way I can sleep with him in our room if he is going to be so cold towards me. The pain I'm feeling is bad enough, but to lie beside him and have him turn away from me, I wouldn't be able to handle it. I lie on top of the covers and cry again. Fi-fi tries to make me feel better by licking my face. I think about calling Ray and asking him to come and get me, but I don't want him to be angry with Christian. Instead, I decide to just go to sleep and hope that tomorrow the cold, angry Christian of today will be replaced by my loving fiance and father to the child I'm carrying.

* * *

 **The Next morning**

 **Sawyer's POV**

My gut tells me there is more to this situation with Roach and Hyde. Barney and Welch are also looking for any information. Roach is easy to follow. He doesn't try to hide unless he is meeting with Hyde, and even then he isn't very inconspicuous. We still haven't found Hyde. I finally get an update from the guy surveilling Roach. He tells me what he has been up to and is looking into the office building Roach was in earlier today.

This doesn't make sense. The only thing that Jack Hyde has ever shown interest in is Ana. Why do all this crap with the books and manuscripts? Nope, it isn't making sense to me. Then, I start to think about the photos Elena sent to Roach before her demise. Ryan was the only witness, and his story never made much sense. I am starting to wonder if there is more to his story. I take out my cell phone and dial Taylor. Mr. Grey decided to head into Grey House early this morning, dragging Taylor long with him. He didn't even look in on Ana last night. Things are really tense right now.

"Jason, I think we need to have a chat with Ryan. Something isn't adding up." I say to him.

"What do you mean Luke?" He asks.

"I don't want to talk about this over the phone. Just have him brought to Grey House. I don't want him thinking something is up."

"Okay, but you better fill me in when you get here. Have Reynolds keep an eye on the little lady." He says before we hang up.

I'm really hoping I'm wrong about Ryan, but deep in my gut, I'm sure he knows something.

 **A/N:**

We're close to the end now. Please leave a review. Thanks!


	13. Chapter 13 What's the plan?

NOTE: this covers pages chapter 418 to 443. This first scene where Ana wakes up is taken directly from page 431. Everything else that follows in **BOLD** are **EXACT QUOTES from those pages**. The action does follow the scene in the book for that particular scene, and sometimes I paraphrase, and sometimes the quotes are re-arranged in a different order. Same goes for the other scene in this chapter with quotes in **BOLD.**

* * *

Chapter Thirteen: What's the plan?

 **Ana POV**

 **I wake with a start, momentarily disoriented...Oh, yes, I'm in the playroom. Because there are no windows, I have no idea what time it is**. I've had a bad (rough) night. After moving from the guest room to the playroom, I woke up twice during the night feeling nauseous and had to run to the toilet. Thank goodness this room has an adjacent bathroom. I place my hand on my belly and think about our Blip and worry he's not getting enough nutrients. Somehow, I need to get through the day.

Fi-fi greets me with licks all over my face; she's happy, she's been allowed to sleep by my pillow all night long. I gently push her away since she won't stop licking me. She moves to sit down at the foot of the bed staring at me with her tongue hanging out of the side of her mouth. She's telling me she's being a good girl.

"Oh, Fi-fi, you're just too cute!" I sigh.

I dig through my purse and pull out a pack of saltine crackers. They're literally my salvation as they take away that awful hollow feeling in my stomach. It occurs to me I gotta get a handle on this morning sickness, even if it means limiting my diet to crackers and water. It sounds awful, but any other food winds up upsetting my stomach sooner or later, it catches up with me.

 **The door handle rattles.**

 **"Ana!" Christian shouts from outside the door. I freeze, but he doesn't come in. I hear muffled voices, but they move away. I exhale and check the time in my blackberry. It's seven fifty. I don't want to be late for work.** I know I left a message saying I would take the rest of the week off, but with everything that's happened, I think getting out of the house is a must. I need the distraction. If I stay here thinking I will go crazy.

I open the door and peek outside with Fi-fi right beside me. **Taylor, Sawyer, Mrs. Jones, and Christian are all standing at the end of the hallway. Christian is issuing rapid-fire instructions. At once, they all turn to gape at me. Christian is still wearing the clothes he slept in last night** ( before coming to the playroom last night I peeked into our room and saw him sleeping taking the entire bed). **He looks disheveled, pale and heart-stoppingly beautiful.**

I open the door a tad more."Sawyer, I'll be ready to leave in half an hour, "I mutter."Could you please take Fi-fi out for her morning walk? I really appreciate it, I just don't have the time this morning."

 **He nods** , **and all eyes turn to Christian who is still staring intensely at me.**

"Fi-fi, it's time for your walk," Sawyer commands and Fi-fi obeys as he goes looking for her leash.

Mrs. Jones asks me if I'd like some breakfast and I shake my head. "I can't eat anything right now, thank you."

"How about some tea to settle your stomach? She insists, and I say yes to that. In response, Mrs. Jones says she will bring me the tea to my room in a few minutes.

"I need to talk to you," Christian says his voice low and husky. Suddenly, the rest of the staff **scatter like terrified rats from a sinking ship.**

 **I slide my purse strap and march toward our bedroom.** I need to take a shower. I want to wash my hair, and by the time I'm finished, I will **feel better, stronger, ready to face the freight train that is Christian Grey.** I head for the bathroom, fully intending to lock the door behind me but he sticks his foot out preventing me from shutting the door.

"I need to take a shower," I pout. "Please move. I don't want to be late for work."

His mouth settles into a grim line. "You're NOT going anywhere."

"What? Am I your prisoner now?"

He rolls his eyes and his face breaks into a mischievous smile. "If that sort of thing turns you on?"

My inner-goddess does a breakdance. Normally I would have gone along with the innuendo but I' m not in the mood so ignore her. I'm actually furious that he's acting like he's calling the shots and I have absolutely no say in any of this. _**How dare he?**_ **I'm not going to let him walk all over me!**

"I've arranged for you to work from home," he tells me. This further infuriates me. **His expression is wary, that of a hunted predator.** He removes his foot from the door, his movements slow and calculated, showing me he's in control.

"Is this the way it's gonna be between us now?" I seethe. "I know I made a mistake, and I asked for your forgiveness, and instead of forgiving me you treat me like this? Well, I got a newsflash for you, Christian! This is not how mature relationships work! People make mistakes, they forgive each other and move on. They make choices together, they don't act like fucking dictators! **You need to stop behaving like a petulant adolescent!"**

And with that, I lock the door and take my shower.

* * *

….

 **Taylor's POV**

Instead of having Sawyer come to GEH to talk to Ryan, I decide to take care of it myself. Ryan's apartment isn't too far from here, and I know he isn't working. There isn't anyone that would hire him. He opens the door and almost looks relieved when he sees it's me. I don't have to ask him anything; he starts to spill the beans right away. He tells me that Hyde is planning on kidnapping Ana from work with Roach's help. Ryan says that he is supposed to help with it, but doesn't want any part of it. The only reason he hid his connection to Elena was because she had something on him and now Hyde and Roach have that. He apologizes, but that doesn't keep me from punching him in the face before I turn around and leave.

The drive back to GEH seems to take forever. I call Sawyer and update him on what Ryan told me. He wants to strangle him for not coming to us in the first place but knows he needs to focus on keeping Ana safe. She wants to leave the apartment, but no one will let her. Gail has been keeping me updated on how Ana is doing. The morning sickness has been bad today, and Ana has been working in the library when she isn't in the bathroom throwing up. All the stress can't good for her.

As I pull into my spot at GEH, I know what I need to do. It's time to fill the boss in. The elevator ride to his office is quick, and I practically run into his office. Andrea says something to me, but I ignore her. This is more important than anything right now. We have an Imminent threat, and we need to deal with it now. I don't knock before opening the door.

Christian is sitting at his desk reading something, he looks up at me from his chair and stands. I'm sure he can see the worry on my face.

"Taylor, what is it?" He asks me as I close the door and motion for him to take a seat on the couch. Once he is seated, I sit in the chair across from him.

"Sir, Sawyer had me talk to Ryan. We found it odd that Elena knew you weren't home and felt that he might have been informing her. It turns out we were right. That's not the worst of it though." I tell him before pausing, knowing that what I'm about to say is going to cause him to go crazy.

"What else is there Taylor?" Christian asks, and I take a deep breath and look him in the eye.

"Hyde is planning to kidnap Ana. We know where he plans on doing it, but we don't know when." I say quickly.

Christian doesn't respond. He doesn't move; he's stunned by the news I've just given him. It's a minute before he stands and walks to the window behind his desk and looks out at Seattle. His calmness is more concerning to me at the moment. I thought we would go crazy and start breaking things. This makes me wonder if something has fundamentally changed between him and Ana, but then I realize that isn't the case when he turns around and violently pushes everything, including his computer monitor, off his desk.

"My own security was involved in this shit Taylor! How the fuck could this happen? FUCK!" He yells as he throws a coffee mug against the wall.

I stand and walk towards him. Over the years I've seen him in many different states, but this is one that I've yet to see. He has so many different emotions going through him at the moment. It's as if he doesn't know what to feel or even what to focus on. I know I need to act and get his attention. He may be angry with Ana for not coming to him, but he loves her and the baby she is carrying. He needs to focus on protecting her and catching Hyde.

I reach out to him and place a hand on his shoulder. "Mr. Grey, you need to calm down and focus. We need to figure out how to protect Ana and catch Hyde. We know where he plans on kidnapping her. We can catch him and finish this. Let's get out of here. We can head to the gym at Escala and talk with Sawyer. It'll be alright."

* * *

 **...**

 **Christian's POV**

As I follow Taylor out of my office, I barely hear him tell Andrea to reschedule my meetings and to have Barney install a new monitor. Right now I'm still trying to process everything. Starting out this morning being angry at Ana, only to now be on edge about keeping her safe. The knowledge that one of my own security also has me questioning who else could be involved. Elena had me in her grasp, but it was more than that. She had people around me in her clutches and made sure she always knew what was going on in my life. The realization makes me sick and once again question my judgment all those years I was in business with her.

I don't even realize we're at Escala until Taylor exits the SUV. My mind has been consumed with the latest information. Taylor informs me that Sawyer has brought my gym bag down and we can head straight to the gym to workout and strategize. I just nod and follow. A workout sounds good right now. I want to run and come up with a plan to keep Hyde from getting Ana, but at the same time making sure he is arrested. I know I should probably be talking to Ana and telling her what is going on, but I can't right now. She's having my baby; she doesn't need added stress.

When I see Sawyer I nod and take my bag to change in the locker room. I don't even notice Taylor following me in so he can change as well. My mind is going over every scenario. I can't help but wonder what would've happened if Ana had gone to work this morning. I admit, I was a dick to her last night and I need to talk to her. If being a dick keeps her here, keeps her safe, then I might have to continue being one. However, I don't want to risk pushing her away. I leave the locker room and hop on the treadmill next to Taylor and Sawyer.

"Taylor, what the hell are we gonna do? Ana wants to leave the apartment and might just try to sneak out if I take my eyes off her." Sawyer starts off the conversation.

"I've got an idea, but I don't know if anyone is going to be happy with it," Taylor replies, and I jump off the treadmill to give him all of my attention.

"What is it, Taylor?" I ask as he and Sawyer get off of their treadmills.

"Ana goes into the office, and we give them an opportunity to take her. It will be arranged in advance. We will have undercover security in the office building. Hyde won't get near Ana. We can stop him before he does." Taylor tells us, and I shake my head.

"No, it's still too risky. I don't want him to be in the same building as her."

"What if we use a decoy? We could get an Ana look alike and make it seem as if she is in the office. We will make sure none of the staff see her and that no one other than security knows she isn't really there. I think we can pull it off; all of her calls are already being routed to the apartment, " Sawyer recommends, and we stay silent for a minute as we consider his proposal.

"He has a good point. I have someone in mind who has a background in security. Her hair color isn't exactly her shade, but they share the same build. Maybe we should bring Seattle PD in on this?" Taylor asks me, and I look at him. For once, I'm unsure what to do. I give it some thought and then it all becomes clear to me.

"I don't want police involved. We need to take care of this internally. Also, I don't want Ana to know about any of this. She doesn't need the stress. Work it out so she doesn't need to be involved. I'm going to head up to the apartment." I say before walking out of the gym, leaving Taylor and Sawyer behind. Right now I need Ana.

* * *

….

 **ANA POV**

My blackberry buzzes and I answer.

" **Ana?"**

" **Yes?"**

" **Ana, honey, it's Jose Senior."**

" **Mr. Rodriguez! Hi!" My scalp Prickles. What does Jose's dad want with me?**

"Honey, I'm so sorry but your dad has been in an accident."

Oh, no, daddy! I stop breathing.

"He's at Mercy Hospital. **You 'd better get here quick.** "

I'm immediately overcome by a strange sensation of not knowing how to react. Fifteen minutes of numbness pass. I text Christian and tell him what happened.

Christian arrives in record time, and we head for the elevator. As it turned out, he was actually in the gym here at Escala. Fi-fi whimpers when she realizes I'm leaving without her, but I tell her firmly that she can't come with me this time.

Mercy Hospital is literally around the corner. Christian and I rush to the ER. I open the door to reveal a functional, austere waiting room. Mr. Rodriguez is waiting for us there.

" **Ana!" Mr. Rodriguez gasps. His arm is in a cast, and his cheek is bruised on one side. He's in a wheelchair with one of his legs in a cast too.** I wrap my arms around him.

Mr. Rodriguez and Christian shake hands. Then, Mr. Rodriguez starts telling us what happened. "We were on our way to Austoria when **we were hit by some stupid fucking drunk."**

A nurse comes to inform us my dad is out of surgery. She tells us we can see him in half an hour.

Before going in to see Ray, we say good-bye to Mr. Rodriguez who tells us my daddy will be in his prayers. **"Stay strong, Ana. He's a fit and healthy man. The odds are in his favor."**

Seeing my daddy in a hospital bed in the ICU brought strangled tears to my eyes. **He looks so small in his large bed, surrounded by all this technology. It's a shock. My dad has never been so diminished. There's a tub in his mouth, and various lines pass through he drips into a needle in each arm. A monitor displays his heart rate.** _ **Beep, beep, beep.**_ **I realize that the tube pulling at the right corner of his mouth leads to a ventilator.**

 _ **Oh, daddy.**_

I remember daddy picking me up and tossing me into the air, both of us laughing and giggling. Back when I was very small, my daddy was my hero. He could do no wrong in my eyes. He was brave, he knew exactly what to do and say in every situation. When I was twelve I promised myself that one day I would marry someone just like him.

"You can go ahead and talk to him," says the petite young nurse standing by the monitors. "Even though he's in a medically induced coma, he can still hear you."

" **Can I touch him? I say tentatively reaching for his hand** , and she says yes.

" **Daddy, please get better.** I love you," I say. There are so many emotions rushing through me right now. Beside me, Christian takes my hand. His touch gives me the courage to continue. "Christian is here too. We're engaged now," I tell him, hoping he'll open his eyes and be pleasantly surprised and congratulates us. I want to tell him about Little Blip too, but then I decide against it. Daddy firmly believes first comes love then marriage and last the baby carriage in that order exactly.

After a little while, Christian and I take a seat in the corner of the room and have a quiet conversation. While we talk I realize how much he and daddy have in common. They both have a quiet strength and are fiercely loyal and possess a high degree of personal integrity.

"Anastasia," Christian murmurs. "It's gonna be okay, your dad is receiving the best care, and he's gonna pull through this."

"I don't know what I'll do if something happens to him," I wail and Christian pulls me into his arms and shushes me. It brings me so much comfort to know he's not angry at me anymore.

"Baby, listen. I will have to go back to the office in a few minutes. I hate leaving you like this, but there's an urgent matter I must attend to," he says looking into my eyes. I can see he's conflicted. "Are you gonna be okay?" He asks with genuine concern, and I know he's referring to my morning sickness.

"Did you have breakfast? I can run and get you something at the cafeteria..."

"I'm okay. I did have something at home," I tell him. What I don't tell him is that I haven't been able to hold anything down. He doesn't need this piece of information. Besides, I don't want him to worry, and truly, there's nothing he can do about my morning sickness. There's nothing that will make it go away.

He looks at me dubiously. "What did you eat?" He drills me.

"Mrs. Jones made me some toast and an egg." I look away, my gaze fixates on daddy. Christian's thumb traces small circles on the back of my hand, causing tiny quivers of pleasure to run up my arm.

"I'm sorry," he says quietly. "I'm sorry about my behavior yesterday and this morning. I was a jerk. I have no excuse."

I breathe a sigh of relief. _It's gonna be okay between us._

* * *

… _.._

 **Christian's POV**

This accident with her father couldn't have come at a worse time. I wanted to talk to her, tell her I forgive her, and, if she was feeling up to it, make love to her. The way I acted was immature, she was right about that. When I told Ana I needed to go into the office, it wasn't a lie. There are things I need to do there, but I also want to put the plan in place with Taylor. Ana won't leave her father's side, so ironically, the timing is perfect for what I need to do. Timing is of the essence.

Because of the urgency, Ana and I went to the hospital without security. It wasn't long before Sawyer arrived at the hospital. I called Taylor and told him to meet me at GEH. If Ray weren't in the hospital right now, I'd laugh at how I look. Jeans and a polo shirt are not my normal attire for the office, but they will have to do. As I walk into the building, I can feel everyone's eyes on me. This is the most casual anyone in the office has ever seen me. Taylor is waiting at the elevator.

"Sir." He greets me.

"Are we set?" I ask him.

"Yes, I've had Andrea call and tell Roach that Ana will be in the office tomorrow. He informed Andrea there will a staff meeting, so she will be working late. I feel that this is a ploy to keep her after all of the other employees have left. We have Ana's double ready. She has been briefed on the situation and is aware of the risks. Sawyer will accompany her tomorrow." He informs me just as the elevator stops at my floor. We don't speak again until we're in my office with the door locked.

"Is Ryan cooperating?" I ask Taylor.

"Yes, he is. He doesn't want this to work any more than we do. He is going along with it only so we can stop them and have a man on the inside." Taylor replies.

"Good. Get him a job far away from here. I never want to see him again, but I don't want to ruin his life. He is good at his job. He just got put in an unfortunate position." I tell Taylor as I pour a glass of scotch.

"Already done Sir. How is Mr. Steele?" He asks.

"Critical, but stable. They expect he will make a full recovery, but he will need to undergo physical therapy when he is able. I've made arrangements to have the best doctors and to make sure he doesn't have to share a room with anyone." I reply as I take a seat behind my desk.

"I've already got Welch getting information on the driver who hit your father-in-law. I'll have a full report by the end of the day."

"Thank you, Taylor, for everything," I say. He nods before he leaves my office.

I lean back in my chair with a smirk on my face. Tomorrow Hyde and Roach are going down. The thought makes me smile. I have plans for Hyde, and I can't wait to use them.


	14. Chapter 14: The End

**A/N:**

A big shout out to Calicutie77: I enjoyed collaborating with you, thanks so much!

 **As always, exact quotes from the book are in BOLD. ALL mistakes are mine only.**

This is the final chapter. If you enjoyed, leave a review at the end, telling me what you enjoyed the most. Your feedback helps me in crafting future stories. Thank you

* * *

Chapter Fourteen: The End

The next day.

 **Hyde's POV**

I feel ecstatic. Today is the day. After Jerry called me yesterday to let me know Ana would be working from the office today, I knew this was our chance to take her. Everything I need is set. Jerry informed me that she arrived this morning and that he told her assistant that she would need to work late to catch up on a few things. The thought of being so close to my goal makes me smile.

Ryan, Grey's former security member, meets me at an empty warehouse. I don't trust him with the plan, so he just thinks I need to get into Grey Publishing to sabotage them. I'm only using him as my getaway driver. Once we get to where we're going, I'll eliminate him.

It's after 6 P.M. when we arrive at the rear entrance. We circle the building and don't notice anything suspicious. Roach sends me a text letting me know that Ana is still in her office and that Sawyer, her CPO, is sitting just outside. The rear door is unlocked, and the cameras have been set on a loop, so I make my way inside the building. I take the stairs and make my way up to her floor. In my hand is a syringe with enough sedative to take down her CPO. And on my waist is a holster with my gun. There's a knife in my right pocket. I 'm also carrying a blindfold, duct tape, another syringe with a sedative, plus zip ties in the deep pockets of my jacket.

Once I'm on her floor, I text Roach to let him know. He is supposed to come down and help me carry her out. From the corner where I'm standing, I can see Sawyer typing away on his phone. Then, he glances toward Ana's office before making his way to the restroom. This is the moment I've been waiting for. I sneak up behind him reaching the restroom, just before the door closes behind him. I quickly take the syringe and stab it into his arm before he has a chance to react. He turns around and tries to grab at me, but I can see that the sedative is taking effect. His knees buckle, and he falls to the floor. I check and see that he is still breathing. I don't want to kill him. I want him to be alive and know that he failed Ana.

I peek out the door to make sure no one is around before making my way to Ana's office. Staying low to the ground, I quietly reach the door and turn the knob. Barely opening it, I'm able to catch a glimpse of her reading a manuscript. She looks a bit different, but I won't worry about that. What matters is that she's within my reach. I open the door a bit more and step into the office. As I reach for my gun, I feel something cold against my neck. Someone has a gun to my head.

"Don't you think about it, Hyde. I won't hesitate to shoot you." The person behind me says. Right then, Ana stands and aims a gun at me. As I get a better look at her face, I realize this woman isn't Ana. I've been played! I raise my hands in surrender, and the woman pretending to be Ana takes my gun and my knife.

"Turn around." The voice behind me commands. I turn around to see Jason Taylor, Grey's head of security.

"Where is Ana?" I ask, curious as to if she was ever in the building.

Suddenly, I get hit with the butt of a gun against the side of my head.

"You don't get to ask any questions." Taylor then turns to Sawyer, the man I thought I had sedated, "put the bag over his head and get him to the van."

"Mr. Grey sends his regards. He hopes you enjoy where he is sending you." Sawyer says to me before placing a black sack over my head and handcuffing me. To say that I'm not scared would be an understatement. I curse under my breath and clench my teeth; I can't believe my plans have been shot to pieces.

* * *

…..

 **Narrator POV**

Roach looks out the tall windows in his office impatiently. _What on earth is taking so long?_ _Why isn't Ryan responding to my text messages?_

At last, a text comes in. It's Ryan. "Come down the service elevator right now."

Roach is a nervous wreck. It seems like this is a change of plans. Maybe Hyde has Ana already. He sends a secondary text to confirm, but he doesn't answer. Maybe something's wrong?

There's no time to waste. He decides to abandon ship and skip checking Ana's office in case their plans have been compromised. Instead, he double checks to see he's got everything he needs in his briefcase: manuscripts, money, credit cards, passport. Check, check, check.

 _Morocco, here I come!_

He'd done the research and Morocco made the ideal getaway destination as it is one of the few relatively safe countries with NO extradition laws with the U.S. But just in case he's later used as a pawn in negotiations between the two countries, or the C.I.A attempts to kidnap him once he's outside the country, he's obtained a second passport with a different nationality as extra insurance.

He grabs his briefcase and runs to the service elevator located on the opposite side of Ana's office. He presses the button and waits. The waiting seems like an eternity. He spots Claire working late; she's staring at him from her cubicle. FUCK! Everyone was supposed to be gone at this hour!. He wants to scream at her: What the hell you're looking at! Dammit! This is taking too long. What if the woman identifies him before he gets to leave the building? His knees began to buckle; he wants no part of this! He practically runs to the other elevator, but on his way there he must walk past Ana's office.

He stops dead on his tracks. The shades in Ana's office are wide open, and he sees Sawyer placing a bag over a man's head and handcuffing him. It doesn't take a genius. That man has got to be Jack Hyde.

He practically jumps out of his skin when he feels a hand tapping him on the shoulder. Even before he turns to look, he already knows this was really bad news.

Turning his head very slowly he's shocked to see Christian pointing a gun right at him.

"NO! NO! Please don't kill me!" Roach thrusts his pleading hands forward. The look of horror on his face was priceless; it was as if he'd seen the devil himself coming to collect his soul.

"You Son-of-a-Bitch!" Christian spat. "You disgusting pig, why should I have mercy on you?"

Roach trembles like a leaf when the barrel of the gun connects with his forehead and recoils at the popping sound the gun makes when Christian pulls the trigger. He squeezes his eyes shut. A second later, a stream of urine starts dripping down his pants and onto the floor. And then there's nothing but an eerie silence.

 _Oh, God, am I dead?_

Slowly, very slowly, Roach dares to open his eyes. Oh, shit, this can't be the afterlife. He's not dead; he's very much alive! Unbelievingly, Christian Grey is still there aiming the weapon at him, except from a distance. Wide-eyed, he watches the smoke dissipate to reveal a little flag with the words BANG written on it coming out of the shiny barrel.

Christian's face suddenly breaks into a huge grin: "Gotcha!"

* * *

…...

 **Taylor's POV**

Sitting at GEH with Sawyer and Christian, we watch a replay of the events that unfolded an hour ago. Fortunately for Sawyer, the sedative didn't have much effect on him. Other than a bad headache, he didn't have any symptoms. He is lucky that he has such a high tolerance. The performance he gave in the restroom was perfect and exactly what we wanted. We knew it would be too risky for Hyde to shoot or stab Sawyer, so we expected him to use a sedative.

"It's over. Did you get the information Roach had?" Christian asks.

"Yes, everything is in our possession. Roach had everything we needed in that briefcase he carried," I reply, remembering the look on the man's face when we turned him over to the authorities along with the manuscripts that were in the vault.

"That turned out well, didn't it?" He smiles a satisfied smile. I agree. The gag trick Christian played on him was hilarious. We knew Roach was not a threat, he did not have a weapon on him because last night we installed a metal detector on the door frame to his office. The man had been so preoccupied that he never even noticed.

"And how are we with the Hyde situation?" He asks.

"He is in route to his new accommodations as we speak," I say with a smile and take a sip of the scotch Christian poured just now.

"Perfect. Thank you both for an excellent job. Take the next couple days off." Christian says as he downs his glass of scotch and turns to stare out at the Seattle skyline at night.

* * *

….

 **Christian's POV**

When I return to the hospital, I find that Ana already knows what happened, having seeing Roach's arrest in the news. She's understandably upset.

"How is your father?"

"He's better. We had a nice conversation," she says happily. In the next moment, however, she regards me with a frown. "You should have told me," she accuses.

I bite my tongue. It serves no good purpose for me to tell her that it really wasn't necessary for her to know.

"I don't like being kept in the dark."

"Neither do I, so I know exactly how you feel," I tell her. "That's exactly how I felt when I found out that Roach had been blackmailing you and you never said a word."

She looks me in the eye, and I see a host of emotions pass by as the realization hits her. "So we both have kept things from each other," she says with a small smile.

"Well," I regard her intently. "Nobody's perfect." I've made my point, and I'm happy. "But you know what, whatever we did, we didn't do it for selfish reasons. We did what we thought was best for the other person. I didn't tell you about the kidnapping plot to protect you, and you didn't tell me about Roach and the pictures because you were trying to protect me."

She gives me the cutest of smiles. "Fair enough."

"Part of me wishes you'd been there though and seen the look on Roach's face. It was priceless," I laugh, and Ana joins me. And I'm happy to hear her laugh.

"So where is Hyde now?" She asks.

"Hmm," I smirk, pretending to search my mind to illustrate how the man's fate is of little consequence. "Ah, yes, he's somewhere in the Sahara desert, I think."

* * *

Two months later

 **Ana POV**

 **"The best decision I ever made was marrying you."**

" **Oh, my. Not starting your company?"**

 **He shakes his head.**

" **Not learning to fly?"**

 **He shakes his head. "You," he mouths. He caresses my cheek with his knuckles. "She knew."**

 **I frown. "She knew what?"**

" **That I was head over heels in love. She thought I needed all the trappings of the lifestyle I enjoyed.** But you know something,the lifestyle **enabled me to keep everyone at arm's length, gave me control and kept me detached. I avoided intimacy for so long...I still feel I don't know how to do this-"**

 **You're doing fine," I say tracing his lips with my index finger. "** More than fine, actually, you're doing great." Christian and I have been married for a month now, and it's been the happiest time of my life. Christian has been so loving and attentive, I sigh. He's my prince charming. "Do you miss the lifestyle?" I ask, even though we've talked about this before. But I want to make sure he's happy.

"Yes and no."

I frown, and he traces his finger over the middle of my brow and above my nose. **"You have a V here when you frown,"** he murmurs. "I only miss the control part. **I can behave so badly** , and yet you married me, and **you're still here. You were right when you told me I am an adolescent."**

This is the first time since we got married that he mentions our big fight that night I slept in the playroom. _**Oh, shit, I did say that! My subconscious glares at me.**_ **"Christian, I said some awful things."**

" **Hush, I deserved to hear them!** I'm not a good person, Anastasia. Sometimes I get so angry I can't see straight. And you still married me," he shakes his head.

Oh, my poor fifty! I take his hand in mine and look deeply into his eyes, and I want nothing more than for him to see how much I love him. I know that his traumatic early childhood is at the heart of all his anger. My heart goes out to him when I think about four-year-old Christian and his dead mother and all the abuse he suffered at an age when he couldn't defend himself or make sense of his world.

"Don't say that. You're a good person. You're the most loving husband a wife could ever have. I love you, Christian... **.and Blip will love you too. Children love their parents unconditionally, and that's how they all come into the world...all babies, even you.** When you were a baby **you still wanted your mom, you loved her."**

" **NO." He whispers.**

" **Yes. You did." My tears flow freely now. "Of course you did. It wasn't an option. That's why you're so hurt. That's why you're able to love me. Forgive her. She had her own world of pain to deal with."**

" **She was a shitty mother."**

 **"She was a shitty mother, and you loved her."**

 **Eventually, he says, " I used to brush her hair, she was pretty.** He caresses my face with the back of his knuckles. "You're amazing. You know that?" He tells me with a look of relief on his face. It's as if he's finally given himself permission to love his birth mother. And I know deep in my heart, that this is the beginning of the healing process for him. "It's amazing you don't think I won't become a shitty father."

There, right there, is the root of all his anxieties. He needs me to reassure him once again.

"Oh, Christian, **do you think for one minute I'd let you be a shitty father?"**

He smiles. **"No, I don't think you would. God, you're so strong, Mrs. Grey, I love you so much."**

I look into his face, and I see hope. That's how I know we'll be able to weather every storm together as a couple and as a family, as long as we remain committed and relying on each other.

* * *

...

 **Two and a half years later**

Our son drops his Popsicle on the ground.

" **Pops!" He sobs.**

" **I know, baby boy. We'll go see Mrs. Taylor and get another one."**

" **Pop," he sniffs. I take his hand and kiss his sticky fingers.**

" **I can taste your Popsicle here on your fingers."**

 **Ted stops crying and examines his hand.**

 **He does. "Pop!"**

" **Yes, Popsicle."**

 **He grins. My mercurial little boy, just like his dad. Well, at least he has an excuse, he's only two.**

 **Christian sweeps Teddy in his arms.**

" **I think daddy wants to taste Popsicle too," I whisper in Ted's ear. Ted frowns at me, then looks at his hand and holds it out to Christian. Christian smiles and puts his fingers in his mouth.**

" **Hmm..." Tasty.**

 **Ted giggles and reaches up, wanting Christian to hold him. Christian grins at me and takes Ted in his arms, settling him on his hip.** Father and son look so happy, I grab my blackberry and snap the perfect picture.

* * *

 **...**

 **Christian lies beside me, his hand caressing my belly, his long fingers splayed out wide.**

" **How's my daughter?"**

" **She's dancing," I laugh.**

" **Dancing? Oh, yes! Wow! I can feel her. He grins as Blip Two somersaults inside me.**

" **I think she likes sex already!"**

" **Really?" He says dryly. He moves so his lips are against my bump. "There'll be none of that until you're thirty, young lady."**

 **I giggle. "Oh, Christian, you're such a hypocrite."**

" **No, I'm an anxious father," he gazes up at me, his brow furrowed, betraying his anxiety.**

" **You're a wonderful father, as I knew you would be," I caress his lovely face and he gives me his shy smile.** "I love you so much...every part of you."

His smile quickly changes to a wicked smile, and he runs his nose down mine. "Every part of me you say? Even the kinky fuckery?"

"Yes, I do. I love it all. I love you so much."

He sweeps me into his arms. "And I love you more, you're my life, you're my everything."

THE END


End file.
